What happened to those marriages that were not favored by their parents?

I had dinner with some friends yesterday, during which I heard a female friend chatting next to me. She said that she had been a boyfriend for several years and planned to marry her.

But their parents don't think highly of them and often talk about her privately. In the end, the girl was forced to break up with the boy in order not to make her parents sad.

The girl is well dressed, but there is a little sadness in her words. I feel that she loved the boy very much, but her parents killed her mercilessly.

Her friend comforted her and said, "Maybe my parents, as experienced people, see farther than us."

This girl's experience reminds me of a friend who had to break up reluctantly because she couldn't get the love of her parents.

But the reason why parents don't like them is ridiculous. It turns out that they will be unhappy together because of the eight-character disagreement.

They have been together since high school. When they were in love, their parents actually didn't object and turned a blind eye.

The two people have a good relationship. After graduating from college, they went to big cities to work hard together. The boy worked hard and planned to marry her.

But when the two were very happy to tell the news to the woman's parents, the parents were very supportive at first.

But what they didn't expect happened. My friend's parents are very traditional, especially superstitious about fortune telling.

One day, her mother asked the boy's birthday, and then quietly took their birthday to the fortune teller.

Finally, as I said before, the fortune teller said that the two were incompatible, and the woman's parents began to strongly oppose this marriage and even threatened to die. In the end, friends can only compromise.

When many people face their opposition and disapproval when their parents interfere in your marriage, our first thought is often not that our parents are doing something seriously "out of line".

But I need to do something to convince my parents to let us be together.

Since ancient times, China people like to pay attention to "parents' orders, matchmakers' words" in their marriage, as if the marriage could not get the attention and blessing of parents, and this marriage would certainly not be happy.

Love is originally a matter for two people, but when it comes to marriage, it becomes something that both families need to participate in. You cannot be free.

Not to mention the happiness of this unpopular marriage, we should really think about it. Are parents really so accurate?

Are parents' opinions really that important? Am I really wrong about my lover?

I remember that Jane Zhang's mother clearly opposed her daughter's marriage in the long Weibo article before Jane Zhang got married, saying that she tricked Jane Zhang into being a mistress.

Embezzled her company shares, only regarded Jing Ying as a tool to make money, and thought that he was by no means a good person who could be entrusted for life.

However, despite her mother's objection, Jane Zhang still insisted on marrying her, and didn't even invite her to the wedding.

In fact, at the scene of the proposal that day, countless people clearly saw that Feng Ke really didn't love her that much.

However, the news of marital disharmony came out frequently, and neither of them laughed when they were photographed by the media.

When she returned to her hometown for the New Year, she even responded, "I hope I can achieve something in my career."

Bram, an American social psychologist, did an experiment to let a subject make a choice between A and B. Under the condition of giving him low pressure, a person said to him, "We chose A".

Under high pressure, someone said to him, "I think we should both choose A".

The experiment concludes that 70% people choose A under low pressure and 40% people choose A under high pressure.

Just as marriage becomes stronger under the obstruction and interference of parents, the stronger the opposition, the deeper the love between lovers.

Psychologically speaking, this is the "Romeo and Juliet effect", that is, the greater the external pressure, the stronger the opposing love will be.

But later research shows that this effect does not exist, because many people can only compromise their parents' opposition and finally pass by love.

According to incomplete statistics, 80% of children will resolutely marry the person of their choice regardless of their parents' opposition.

Follow-up survey shows that at least 70% of marriages without parents' blessing are unhappy, and 75% of them regret not listening to their parents.

In fact, this also shows that marriage without parents' blessing is unhappy and reasonable.

As experienced people, they have rich life experience, so in any case, parents still have some discrimination.

And we, young and energetic, always feel that love is supreme, and we oppose our parents with rebellious psychology, thinking that we have won love.

Actually, it's not that parents don't allow both parties to get married. I just can't see the dawn of happiness from them.

Of course, we are not going back to the bad habit of arranged marriage, but if you have grown up as a parent, you will understand that your parents' seemingly tough opposition is not unreasonable.