Repost: Mother is the best feng shui for a family
When I got home from get off work, I found my husband and son sitting on the sofa watching "In the World" together.
My husband was wiping his tears with paper. When my son heard the door opening, he ran over to me crying and hugged me and said, "Mom, I'm so sad. That super nice grandma passed away..." I looked at the TV. It was discovered that in the plot of this episode, Zhou’s father and Zhou’s mother passed away one after another.
While I was helping my son wipe the tears from his face, I was thinking: Why is she the most inconspicuous person in "Human World", but she has earned the tears of 30 million viewers? Even Mr. Liang, the original author of "The Human World" couldn't hold back tears when he saw this scene. The words of a netizen revealed the truth: "She is not the protagonist in "The World", but she is the pillar and soul of the entire Zhou family."
Zhou's father is away from home all year round, and she takes care of three people by herself. When a child grows up, he never complains or complains about suffering or tiredness. She used her gentleness, kindness, and generosity to fill the childhood of her three children with a warm undertone. She used her tenacity and optimism to turn her hard life into poetry, and raised each of her three children to be better than the last, making the entire Zhou family the most enviable family in "Guangzi Pian".
I remember this passage in "The Influence of Mother": "A family, even if it has four walls, as long as there is an upright, hard-working, kind and optimistic mother, such a family is a temple and a place for spiritual growth. Source. A mother’s influence on a child is like an unending force that will last throughout the child’s life. “Having a good mother is truly the greatest blessing for a child and the best feng shui for a family.
1. Mother’s optimism is the source of energy for the child’s life
The “light picture” of the Zhou family’s life is a poor and crowded shanty town. Zhou's mother was never full of resentment because she lived in a "light character film". On the contrary, she worked very hard to turn her hard life into poetry. She greets her neighbors warmly with a smile every day. The family is surrounded by walls, but they still keep the house clean and orderly. Life was tight, but she was still able to mend things with a smile and look forward to saving pork for her children that could only be eaten during the Spring Festival. Her two beloved children were about to leave home and go to a poorer and more difficult place. She held back all the reluctance and sadness and waved goodbye to the children with a smile. Poverty, hardship and separation did not make her smile disappear at all, nor did she lose her confidence and expectations for the future.
Martin Seligman once said in "Live an Optimistic Self": "The mother's optimism is very similar to that of the child, whether it is a son or a daughter. This shows that the child mainly learns the mother's understanding of cause and effect. Explanatory style of relationship” Indeed. The three children of the Zhou family have inherited their mother's optimism and strength: the eldest son and the second daughter are full of talents and are full of confidence in their futures, whether at home or in remote mountainous areas. They believed that the current suffering would be over. They worked hard for their ideals and were admitted to Peking University together. The third son Bingkun, although not as outstanding as his elder brothers and sisters, has never lost his positive heart. He did the hardest and most tiring work in the lumber mill and soy sauce factory, but he never disliked or complained. His mother was paralyzed in bed, but without any fear or flinching, he shouldered everything by himself without telling his brothers, sisters, and father. He was imprisoned twice, but he always maintained a pure heart that loved life. No matter how much he lost, no matter how difficult it was to start over, he gritted his teeth and persisted and worked hard, just as he once said to Zhou Nan That sentence is the same: "Bitter, chew it and swallow it."
Taiwanese writer Huang Shuwen once said: "As long as you live out the example you set for your children, your children will naturally grow into what they see. People." I deeply agree. A mother's attitude towards life and suffering will subtly influence her children and become a role model for them to learn from. Lori Lee, the author of "Rosie and Cider", once recalled her childhood in the book: "Although it was at the end of World War I and the society was in turmoil, in my childhood memory, the four seasons are full of joy. This All because I have a mother who is strong and optimistic no matter what circumstances she finds herself in." Faced with the difficult situation of having to raise a large group of children alone, with poor food, a dilapidated wooden house, and her father not knowing when to return, Lori Lee's mother is still happy. He took the children to pick fruits from the forest, taste the ice under the eaves, and dance in the dilapidated hut.
Lori Lee's mother made the miserable days full of enthusiasm, allowing Lori Lee to have a happy childhood, and also planted an equally optimistic and strong seed in Lori Lee's heart to support her. He bravely and confidently accepted the test of life and grew into an excellent writer through hardships.
It is no exaggeration to say that the mother’s strong optimism hides the warmth and good luck of the child’s life. Because what a strong and optimistic mother passes on to her children is self-confidence, courage and responsibility that they can use throughout their lives. A mother's love is the confidence and motivation for a child's growth. Unlike Zhou's father who is upright and strict, Zhou's mother is always very tolerant and loving towards her children. The youngest daughter she loved most abandoned her family when she was just a teenager and went to Guizhou to elope with Feng Huacheng, who was more than 20 years older than her. Although Zhou's mother was angry and sad, she still cared about Zhou Rong very much. She looked forward to Zhou Rong coming home every Spring Festival. The eldest son, Bingyi, who made her most proud, married the daughter of the governor's family and lived with her mother-in-law for a long time. She did not blame Bingyi, but was afraid that Bingyi would be embarrassed and never took the initiative to disturb her in-laws. As soon as she heard that her in-laws were coming to her home, Zhou's mother quickly packed up with her children and welcomed them warmly. Her in-laws were temporarily absent due to something else, and accidentally returned the gifts they sent. She still didn't want to complain or blame her son. The youngest son Zhou Bingkun is not smart and has no big ambitions. He is often kicked and kicked by his father and is called a "useless old pimple" by his neighbors. But Zhou’s mother was able to discover Bingkun’s shining points, and sincerely encouraged him and affirmed him: “Smart, capable, and very powerful.”
The famous educator Herbert Spencer said Said: "When a child is in a family atmosphere of understanding, respect, and encouragement, his trust in his parents will double, and his growth will be more motivated." Zhou's mother's love and tolerance gave the three children Life has a warm background, which also fills children's growth with confidence and motivation. Because of this, Zhou Rong, who "eloped for love", understood at a young age that "a good life is more important than good years"; Zhou Bingyi, who is "ambitious", can still stick to his beliefs no matter whether he is misunderstood or falsely accused. , step by step from the leader of a state-owned enterprise to the mayor, governor; Zhou Bingkun, "the most unpromising and the most difficult to live", also relies on his simplicity, kindness, righteousness and diligence to struggle from a young worker to a hotel manager, becoming Zhou Bingkun The "most reliable and filial" child in the family.
Teacher Wu Zhihong said: Why does home hurt people? You give your child hate, but you expect to get love from him; you give your child pain, but you expect to get gratitude from him; you give your child a shadow, but you expect that he will always be positive and have no shadow. For children, persuasion is better than persuasion, encouragement is better than blow, gentle breeze is better than strong wind and rain, and gentle guidance is better than all harsh words. The warmth and strength in a child's heart can never be separated from the nourishment of love. Being a mother who is good at discovering the bright spots of her children and does not hesitate to encourage and praise them is a compulsory course for every mother.
2. The mother’s emotions hide the child’s lifelong sense of security and happiness
? Chizuru Ueno wrote in "Misogyny": "Mothers put themselves in life The dissatisfaction is mixed with the feeling of being unable to change the current situation. This kind of venting of negative emotions is the source of the conflict between mother and daughter, and the home becomes a cage." The precarious parent-child relationship in a family with many children, and the warm companionship between Zhou's mother and her three children, have made countless netizens envious. And this is all due to Zhou's mother being a calm mother. She will not turn her dissatisfaction with life into control and oppression of her children like Zhu Chaoyang's mother in "The Hidden Corner". Nor will she be like the single mother in Nantong, Jiangsu who violently forced her primary school daughter to study college mathematics, dumping all her pain, anxiety, dissatisfaction and resentment on her child. Mother Zhou always had a smile on her face and endured the torment and pain of life alone. She has never blushed with her husband, nor has she been serious with her children. She has never complained or collapsed because of the "hard life", nor has she threatened her children with her parental authority, nor kidnapped her children with a sense of sacrifice. Even before Zhou's father died, he still held on to his strength, pretending to be relaxed and giving instructions and chatting with his children. She knew everything in her heart and tried her best to restrain herself from exposing Zhou's father's illness in front of her children. After Zhou's father passed away, she did not feel great sadness. But when the children were keeping vigil, he pretended to be calm and persuaded the children to go back to the house to rest: "If you get frostbite, your father will not forgive me.
"Until the tired and sad children all fell asleep, she came to the yard alone, held Zhou's father's hand, sat upright, and accompanied Zhou's father peacefully, leaving the children forever. < /p>
She has been so indifferent, so calm, and so determined throughout her life. "Original Family" said: "Children absorb emotional information like a sponge absorbing water, and they will absorb it completely indiscriminately. "A mother with a calm mood must raise children who are determined, confident and calm. Feng Huacheng cheated, Zhou Rong was shocked, but she did not cry or fight, but she helped Feng Huacheng decently . Zhou Bingyi was maliciously and falsely accused of "abusing his power" and was suspended for review. He did not defend or retaliate. He calmly said: "Whatever comes, let's take care of it and trust the organization." "Zhou Bingkun went through several ups and downs and was imprisoned twice, but each time he accepted the consequences calmly and continued to work hard for a better life. Facts have proved that being a mother with a peaceful mood is a blessing for a child's life. Because, a mother's The calmer the mood, the more stable and powerful the child's inner world is, and the easier it is to achieve success and happiness.
Song Qingling said: "A child's character and talent are ultimately influenced by his family and parents, especially his parents." It is my mother who has the most profound influence. "Yes, what kind of person a child will eventually become depends on what kind of mother he has. The mother is optimistic and strong, and the child is brave and tenacious; the mother is tolerant and loving, and the child is kind and confident; the mother is emotionally calm, and the child is warm and firm in heart. Mother's Wisdom, emotion and inner passion are the source of a child's good character and good life. Hu Shi once wrote in "My Mother": "My mother has a great spirit, a good temper, and is the kindest and gentlest to others. She never says a word of hurt." Words of human emotion. If I can learn a little bit of good temper, if I can learn a little bit of kindness in dealing with others, if I can forgive people and be considerate - I have to thank my mother. "May we all be role models for our children and the people they want to thank most in the future!
***Mian!