What funny things did Yu Qian say in Guo Degang’s cross talk?

Just search for Brother Qian’s quotes

Dream Marriage”: Hey! Even if I beat you to death, you don’t know much! This is too confusing for you!

"Dream of the Western Expedition": This helicopter is also diesel powered.

"I Want Happiness": Isn't my father heartless?

I am also very happy...

According to what you said, it was you first...and your father later.

Also There is the most classic line in "Yellow Crane Tower": "...I am hungry when I sing with him!..."

You should also do some exercise~

"On Peng Dou": In fact, my father is also dead, I forgot to mention it!

"Civil and Military Perfection": Ignorant? This is so exciting!

"白事会"----Not Enough to Burn Money

Civil and Military: I'm about to see a monk selling rice dumplings

"In My Life" 》Saving the bottom line, Guo Degang added some impromptu information and said that he never drowned once while practicing swimming on the lawn. Brother Qianer responded quickly: Didn’t he bury himself alive? (It may not be completely accurate, but this is what it means). Several old sticklers in the audience were very happy at that time!

"I Want Happiness": Guo: At this time, I saw my girlfriend and her boyfriend coming over holding hands from inside. What a treat this is.

Yu: This is so sad!

"My Life": Miss Prejudice pushed me out of my sleep...Brother Qian: Is this you who pushed me? !

The audience burst into laughter. Guo stared at Brother Qian fiercely and said angrily: "Is there such a thing about Ci'er backstage?!" Brother Qian said: "Why don't you say it according to Ci'er?" The audience burst into laughter. Tuan, in La Fang's words - everyone is dead!

Guo: Yu Qian's father came to me and said there was a riddle that he had been thinking about for a long time but didn't know. Looking at Hou Yuewen from a distance and looking at the washbasin up close...

Yu: My father has never heard of cross talk

Given Yun Wei's work "Looking for a Tang Hui"

Yun Wei (pouring): One jar per person, have you drank?

Yu: Why is it a altar?

Yun Wei (pouring): Dip your finger in the wine and pop it into your mouth.

Yu: You can drink it, you can drink it! Whether you can drink it or not is another matter!

The audience went crazy at that time!

"Strange Cure"

Guo: The bride will take off her prosthetic leg and chop you!

Yu: I’ll chop him with mine too!

There is a sentence in "Dream of the Western Expedition", "What are you saluting? Do you think I will throw you a piece of bread?"

I remember one time Brother Qian gave it to Master Guo Guo: This job is really tiring. Why don't you take my side and tease me for a while? Brother Qian immediately replied: No, no, no, I can't come here. I won't turn around this way. Mr. Guo was also quick: He immediately took a step to the side and I'll follow you here. At that time, the audience was in a state of confusion.

When recording the truth that day, because the studio was too hot, Mr. Guo used a tissue to wipe his sweat

The host said that he could pinch it when it was broadcast

Mr. Guo said it can be mosaic

Brother Qianer followed, who knows where you can mosaic

I was wondering about this sentence in the second half, too Amazing

"Selling Tickets" Guo: What is it, what kind of trick? Three words! ...Yu: Think about this carefully! !

"Entrusting a Wife to Offer a Son" De Gang said: "I won't go in day by day." Yu Qian said: "You still won't come out night after night."

De Gang said: "My Gu Quan is this"

Yu Qian pointed at his butt and said, "Yours is not as good as mine."

In the 22nd round of reversal, Yu Qian always said thing. Guo: "Everyone doesn't know, Yu Qian was a child."...Yu: "You introduced me like this, so everyone knows a lot."

"I Want Happiness", Guo "The only difference between me and Superman is that He wears his pants outside"... Qian: "Then try wearing your pants outside next time"

A second-hand scientist invented a voice-activated light. Yu: You can see his face. !

You are so angry at my wife

"I want happiness": Guo Degang encouraged himself in the women's room in the mirror, "You will definitely succeed"...Yu Qian continued He said "I'm reciting a happy song~~~"

"Learning from Xihe": Knock again, and I'll beat the drum to you

I don't know whether he likes to listen to this scientist or not Listen to this second-hand

About Miss Prejudice: Tsunako said, "She ate up the portion in front of me one spoonful at a time." Brother Qianji said, "Yeah, she couldn't see the portion in front of her." "What?"

Tsunako said that Miss Prejudice woke him up, and Brother Qianer said, "Is it you who she recommended?" It was hilarious!

Another time when they were talking about "The Second Sister Wang Misses Her Husband", Tsunako took Qian'er's brother's appearance and said, "I'm a joker." But she accidentally said, "I'm a joker." " Then he immediately changed it back to "I'm a prankster", and Brother Qian'er answered, "Didn't you just say it was funny?" Tsuna was stunned for a moment before he realized what he was saying, and turned around to punch Brother Qian'er.

Everyone in the audience was happy.

I feel that Brother Qian'er's measurement of Tsunako's work was perfect and the tacit understanding was perfect.

"My Life": Yu said to Guo: This is what you two call performance art!

In "Starting Tonight", the scholar was in a hurry to pick up his wife from the karaoke hall after get off work. Yu Qian asked Guo: What does your wife do?

Guo: I don’t know Yu Qian, but you have never eaten pork!

Yu: The Hui people don’t know much about it ~

In the Sina New Year Cross Talk special, "Civil and Military Suits" was mentioned. Guo said that his father was a master of martial arts: "...pointed, barbed, hooked The bladed one...what is a golden bell, what is an iron trousers, I have practiced them all."... Yu stretched out his hand to stop him: "Stop practicing, it will become useless if you practice anymore..."

"On Dreams" ": Guo: "There are people who were shot in a square shape with three explosion marks on them. It's so scary!"

Yu: "What's so scary about this? Don't you see it every morning?"

The scene at the People's Liberation Army Opera House:

Second appearance

Gang: Just now... I was faced with Peng...

Qian: Being cheated?!

Gang: This is the first time I saw a host wearing something that looked like a red envelope.

Qian: No wonder. That girl in Lier was wearing it.

Guo repeated the previous paragraph: When you were three years old, your father called you over...

Qian: Let me put it this way, this special performance was really good

< p> Bin Laden is also greedy

"Dance Master": My mother has a thin intestine

In the short paragraph after "Anti-Japanese Special":

Guo: Stand here The big guy next to us is called He Yunwei. He is a giant in our backstage and is my apprentice. This one here (referring to Li Jing)

Yu: The one with small eyes? !

Guo: Don’t you feel guilty?

Yu: We are all ashamed

Don’t talk about your grandfather

To this day, I still think that the most successful joke between Guo and Yu is—— —Yellow Crane Tower.

When Qian'er brother mentioned to the class leader that he studied opera at Mr. Ma Lianliang's house and learned to sing the singing style of Hui people selling steamed buns, he immediately said, "Well, that's right. Is Mr. Ma Lianliang a Hui people?" Time is running out! !

Guo: You have to ask, ‘Dad, why are you going? ’

Yu: I’m going to take a shower...

Brother Qian also praised Yun Wei once for "Looking for the Tang Hui" and he was also full of witty words!

For example: Have you found a good place for your business? Is it the shopkeeper’s full moon? ...Dapeng has also been broadcast in the program

It seems like a sheep in a tree

Guo Degang stood with his shoulders slanted

Brother Qianer said: Why are these scientists so stubborn?

The combination of the body shape is so funny

Everyone said the word "Okay", so Sir, the taste and heat are the best

"Article Club"

Yu: Which gallery usually sells your calligraphy~~~~

Guo: We are a hair salon Not selling...we are buying...

Yu: "We are asking about work, we don't care about private life"

Are there any grenades thrown upward?

Degang said at the Tianjin Provincial Provincial Special Performance "I Want to Go to the Spring Festival Gala": Ne (ne) actors all have flower baskets, but I didn't even have a wreath after all the effort. The teacher said: You are not old enough! (coax)! The class leader said: Is there any security guard? Pointing at Teacher Yu, he said: This is enough to kill someone in 5 minutes.

Dou Gongxun Nuli: Don’t you step on the stick during the performance? We've thought about it.

And spoken language: It’s really not that good

What did that foreign bitch say?

"Is there such an unreasonable wife?!"

Haha, everyone knows what part it is.

What about you, this stinky sister?

The most classic one is actually: Ouch...ho!

Guo: ...The main reason is that the business card management system is not perfect. I want to print a president, and he also prints it for me. The president is also a priest, and he also prints it...

Yu: You still have both spiritual and material resources to hold on to.

Guo Degang said he saw his girlfriend and her boyfriend coming over. Master Guo even shook hands with the man and exchanged greetings.

Brother Qianer said: But we really have a harmonious society.

In "Dream Marriage"——

Guo: Shave the noodles! Hand-Pulled Noodle! Beef noodles! One bowl is wide and one bowl is thin!

Yu: Just eat it?

This little baggage is the most memorable thing about Brother Qian'er...

In the middle of the mandarin jacket

Li: Please be careful when you wear my mandarin jacket. Look, there are urine cocoons on it

He: Isn’t this the result of sneezing?

Yu: This guy is serious! (I burst into laughter every time I hear this)

On teasing - Yu: "Let me tell you this, just to tell you about this cross talk, everyone in our family died!"

p>

Marriage in a dream - Guo: "I was walking on the road holding four pieces of donkey meat on fire, and the police didn't dare to look at me. It's great to have money.

...Yu: "Is the dog chasing you?"

My dad's shit is to commemorate the 60th anniversary of anti-fascism

The leader of Qingdaguli said that Yu Qian's father is bisexual The knife is in the boss. Teacher Yu immediately said: That was when he was not chopping his hands~~~~~~~~~

I won’t say how happy he was under the stage, anyway, Guo Le had to bend down straight ~~~~~~~~

What kind of winter is this?

Guo: "There is another person in the background who can compare with Teacher Yu."

Yu: "That's not easy for this person!

Is there a third floor here?

"You didn't even say my words at the same time"!

"The Second Sister Wang Misses Her Husband" Guo: Please zip up those pants. Yu: Well, I should have known better. What a nice coat.

It’s so fun

During the episode of Starry Night hosted by Yu Qian, Chaodong said about the secretary scandal: “The boss asked the female secretary to give the keys and the female secretary refused. ..." Yu Qian said: "This is considered an attempt..."

When taking off his coat, Chaodong said: "Brother Qian'er, you don't mind changing here, do you? "Yu Qian said: "It doesn't matter, this business is all about putting on and taking off clothes..."

Xu Deliang: I got earrings because my ex-girlfriend wanted to get earrings and asked me to accompany her.

Yu Qian: What should you do if your current girlfriend wants to have breast augmentation?

The special performance to commemorate Mr. Wang Fengshan was also a joke from "Tonight Starts"

Yu :I can see that you are a person who pays lip service to everything and has nothing to do with reality at all (A child in the audience said: "Yes")

Guo (pointing to the child) :Is this your father?

Yu (also pointing at the child): Who is more like his father at our age?

Guo: I look like

"Wenwu Xun" Disciple"

Guo: If you tell me again, I will drag you to the tiger bench!

Yu: Qu Xie works in Zhazidong!

(Huaerzi) Very tight)

At the sealing award ceremony at the end of last year, when the sesame biscuits came on stage to receive the award, the sesame biscuits shook their faces——

Yu Qian: Okay, stop shaking your arms, you will be on fire in a while , I’m a fool. (The audience burst into laughter)

I don’t remember which part, the class leader said, "I’ll buy a pound of watermelon! I’ll buy a piece of soybean curd!"

Qian Brother said, put watermelon on it and eat it?!

Guo: The little girls who sang drums all had their heads tied up, applied rouge and powder, and looked backwards, so beautiful! There were several big flower baskets in one scene. < /p>

Yu: Aren’t you?

Guo: When we got there, not to mention flower baskets, not even wreaths

Yu: (said with a smile) Maybe it’s you is less than

Guo: I hate...

There is another sentence that I think is the most classic

In "Vinegar Lights the Lamp"

Guo: I don’t want to do this anymore.

Yu: Who is this nanny?

Guo: Mrs. Guo Degang. >Yu: Wasted a good medicine...

The time when Guo Degang moved me (History of Babao) the most

It seems to be the National Day Seven-Day Music Crosstalk Conference, when Wang Hui just finished singing

Guo Yu went up,

"The actor who sang the drums just now sang so well"

The audience laughed, and Yu Qian also laughed:

"You really praise me"

"Nonsense, if I don't praise him, who will praise him...then my wife"

Laugh

"I My wife asked me to just concentrate on the cross talk, and I don’t need to worry about anything else. This is also called hoping that my son will become a dragon."

The audience laughed wildly

Yu Qian was extremely happy:

"You are really willing to go all out, you have never been so generous to us"

Dream Marriage"

Guo: "I held 4 donkey meat and burned it on the road If I leave, the police won’t even look at me. It's great to have money.

Qian: "Is the dog chasing you?" "

The class leader of Qingdaguli said that Yu Qian's father was the boss with two swords. Teacher Yu immediately said: That was when there was no chopping of hands~~~~~~~~~

I won’t tell you why the audience is so happy, but the class leader is so happy that he bends over~~~~~~~~

He and Dana are looking inside the hall

Big Brother Qian and Dana fought for a drink of water, and the water spilled everywhere. Dana leaned on the table to drink.

Teacher Yu stopped him and said, "Why are you drinking so much?" ah? Okay, lick my face again later. " (Brother Qian also sprinkled it on his face)

In the cross talk "Civil and Military Perfection":

Guo Degang pretended to be Jin Yong, wrote a poem on the ground with bricks, stood up, and He tapped his feet and recited:

I can't wake up in the spring, I can hear the singing of birds everywhere; the sound of wind and rain at night, I know how many flowers have fallen.

Yu Qian said: Well, fortunately it is five-character. If it were Qiyan, I would have to break off my big crotch.

"Sheep on the Tree"

Guo: What are you thinking about? Let's just perform on the stage. For example, if you see me walking down the street in the future, ask me, Dad, you Why are you going...

Qian: I'm going to take a shower. .

In the super interview, the class teacher said that he loves reading books, and he loves books as much as his life: If our family's money is lost, I may not know it, but if it is said which book is missing, I can tell

Brother Qian immediately said: Yes, the money is all in the book

In the dream wedding, the host asked Liu Xiang to pull a rickshaw for him,

Brother Qian said: "It fell down You can't catch up!"

When you practice, do you put a pot under it? ——I am a gangster

My brother came back naked? ——Bai Shihui

That’s not to see the big drum, that’s to see the thighs! ——I want to go to the Spring Festival Gala

When crossing the street with Miss Prejudice, one looked to the left and the other to the left On the right: "When you two are together, it's called performance art! - My whole life

To gain knowledge, I have to bleed - to give my wife and children

To: Going to the toilet Guo, who is talking about cross talk behind the stage, is sorting out the armed belts: OK, all the armed belts are tied inside.

Guo: Do ​​you know me?

Qian: No.

Guo: Take a look.

Qian: You can’t see it.

Guo: Look carefully.

How can that happen? See.

Guo: Your brain is over.

Qian: What’s wrong?

I’m the second-hand scientist.

p>

Qian: Hey! How about we not go down just now? ——Sheep on the tree

Guo: Those who study astronomy are not allowed to study geography. You used to study astronomy and astrology, but you suddenly studied geography. Why don't you study the stars and the moon and study geography all day long? Get up early every morning and visit Qinghe, Shahe, Changping County, Nankou, Kangzhuangzi, Huailai County...

< p>Brother Qian: Are you a scientist?

Guo: I don’t do geography.

Brother Qian: That’s not true. Those who talk about cross talk are not done yet.

——Sheep on the Tree

Guo: When you go to that swimming pool, what kind of swimming suits do the people in there wear? Do you want to lose face?

Yu: Nonsense! Your family wears cotton-padded jackets to swim~-------------I want to rebel against the three customs

And this one

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Quotes from Brother Qian