Funny copywriting in friends circle
2. Today, I trained my dog at home. After the training, my husband walked over and said to the dog earnestly, "Oh, how dare you fight the tiger?" You are just a dog. "
3. I fought with my classmates and made an appointment. The other party found a dozen people, so I had to call my brother. My brother drove a broken car and got off the bus and went to the other party. They slapped him and kicked him down. Then he came up to me and said, damn, you're looking for so many people. I said, no, he found all this. Then my brother turned blue.
4. I don't understand why fat people are laughed at by thin people. Why should a group of people who turn their finished meals into meat be laughed at by those who turn their finished meals into shit?
5. I made a blind date with a girl. My mother liked her very much, and so did my father. Finally, I recognized her as my adopted daughter and said that I was not worthy of her.
VI. White shirts are prone to yellowing, and ordinary washing powder is difficult to wash off, which makes many people feel headache. Here's a tip: Take some painkillers before washing the white shirt, and your head will be less painful.
7. I just want to say that my parents suspect me of puppy love, and you overestimate my ability.
8. which is more important, the daughter-in-law or the game? Of course, daughter-in-law is important, so I only dare to play games, but I dare not hit my daughter-in-law
9. Some girls are like lotus, hibiscus, some girls are like peony, noble and elegant, some girls are like plum blossoms, cold and aloof, and you are like a fleshy person, as the name suggests.
1. I finally got used to my looks, got a haircut, and changed to an ugly method.
Xi. I have to tell my son a lot of sermons every day. I hope he will understand as soon as possible that people like me who only preach sermons all day long will not be successful.
12. Girls who don't work hard will have endless stalls and endless shopping in the vegetable market. If you work harder, you won't have time to shop or go to the market, so you can only work overtime to order takeout.
XIII. On the first day of school, I beat my deskmate, and the teacher told me to call my parents. I said: nothing, I can beat him by myself!
14. Isn't it good to find a fat girlfriend? You chose the biggest one for the same money!
15. Sometimes, when I say "I'm fine", I just hope someone can look into my eyes, hug me tightly and say, "I know you're not fine", and then take out a pile of big bills and put them in my arms.
XVI. Recently, I feel very sad because of my appearance, and even feel very inferior, because others always say that no one who looks good is a good thing.
17. When we were young, we all made mistakes. We always called girls in their twenties aunts and boys uncles, so now we get what we deserve. We have to pay them back sooner or later when we go out to hang out!
18. If marriage is the grave of love, then blind date is to look at the feng shui for the grave, confession is to dig the grave, marriage is double suicide, empathy is to move the grave, and the third party is to rob the grave.
19. I heard that when a boy speaks, it will be more gentle, such as: Baby, where is your best friend? Life deceived me. I was so unwilling, so I turned on the filter, skinned, whitened and long-legged special effects, and finally deceived life in a crazy retouching!
21st. My mother likes playing mahjong, but then I was born. My mother resolutely gave up mahjong for me and the whole family, because she thought it was more interesting to hit me.
XXII. I'm not a vain person. I hate villas, sports cars, designer bags, clothes and shoes. I only like money.
XXIII. Every time the teacher finishes the topic, he always asks me if I understand it. He always thinks that the teacher is too kind to me. On the day of graduation, he suddenly said, "It's good to have you in this class. If you understand it, I know that everyone must understand it."
24. Everyone's life is a book, others' is a happy life, and mine is a complete collection of jokes.