Why do fortune tellers say that marriage should be inclusive?

In marriage, many women will choose to tolerate the other half for the harmony of husband and wife.

This practice is understandable, but from the perspective of love psychology, blindly forbearing is not only not conducive to maintaining the relationship between husband and wife, but also accelerates the process of marriage breakdown; The reason is mainly due to the following two considerations:

On the one hand, long-term tolerance will make you accumulate a lot of grievances, and you will be very unhappy; Especially in critical periods such as pregnancy, breastfeeding and confinement, your mood is more likely to fluctuate, and your pain will multiply.

For example, in these critical periods, you feel anxious, uneasy and confused, and you have a lot to say to your partner. In addition, I hope he can understand your emotions, give you companionship and care, and help you share some things.

But every time you communicate with him and ask him for something, he always looks impatient and perfunctory in a few words, and there will be no change at all. Sometimes he even complains that you have too many things to do and it is not easy to understand him.

You know that you will quarrel if you talk to him again, so in order not to hurt the relationship between husband and wife, you put up with it, and you wronged yourself in exchange for the temporary harmony between husband and wife; But as you endure more and more times, your inner grievances will continue to accumulate and grow.

On the other hand, blindly forbearing will make him not understand or agree with your efforts and even accuse you of not doing well enough, which will make your life in this marriage very difficult.

Maybe you paid a lot in your marriage. You do housework, take care of children and take care of the elderly. At the same time, you have to make money to support your family. You are like a running machine. You feel very tired and need his support.

But whenever you express your feelings to him and tell him that you need comfort and emotional support, he always looks like he doesn't understand. He feels that it is also very hard to work hard outside, and he has paid a lot to take care of this family. ...

Finally, it turns out that you understand that it is not easy for him to earn money to support his family. You understand his hard work, so you choose to be patient and suppress your own needs.

But if you have been patient and don't communicate and tell, he won't know how much you have paid for this marriage, let alone understand and love you. He will only think that you agree with your current lifestyle, and if you continue to get along with you like this, your marriage will undoubtedly be more difficult and you will be very tired.

Therefore, forbearing the other half can only make your marriage look peaceful temporarily, but after a long time, your inner grievances and fatigue will crush you, you will find that marriage is meaningless, and then you will have the idea of ending this marriage.

From a realistic point of view, it is often those who are rational, patient and tolerant in marriage, because they will not easily express their dissatisfaction, and those who can bear it will generally bear it, but this patience will eventually develop to the point of unbearable and come to an aggressive outbreak; Aggressive and explosive expressions often cause the defense and counterattack of the other half, which eventually leads to the rigidity or direct breakdown of the relationship between husband and wife.

Therefore, it is very important to run a marriage. Don't blindly tolerate the other half, don't suppress yourself and don't compromise. Instead, communicate with him, tell him what you want to say, and let him know how much you have paid in your marriage, how much effort you have made, how much you have suffered, and so on.

Only when he knows your hardships and difficulties will he take the initiative to love you and you can get everything you want.

May you cherish the people you love, learn to love, give love and reap love.