At the age of 24, he has his own anniversary. It turns out that the meaning of life lies in solving the puzzles in his heart. I've been looking for it for a long time, and that's all I remember

That night in March, the sky was overcast. Lin Yan was wandering alone in the street. When he looked up, an advertisement in a shop came into view-we can live by snuggling together. This is the lyrics of his beloved Leslie Cheung's Warm. The dead are gone, but a song can last forever.

After a little hesitation, he pushed the door and went in.

Maybe it's the rainy season, and the business in the store is deserted, and the tables and chairs are empty. Only a woman in a dark brown apron hung her head behind the counter.

She looked up when he came to the counter.

Four eyes relative moment, he couldn't help but slightly zheng.

The woman in front of her, with dark eyes, clear and pure brow, black hair softly scattered behind her head, and slightly raised lips look peaceful and quiet.

He ordered a glass of blue mountain, then went to the window and sat down. Outside the window, it is raining.

After a while, she smiled and gave him the brewed coffee. When she turned around, Lin Yan suddenly stopped her. Can we talk?

Her name is Jing Zhe.

He was a little surprised. This is a solar term. All the bugs are awake. Their name is Jingzhi, which obviously means humble.

Why is it called this name? He felt a little out of line. But she still has a temper when she smiles.

Because I was born on the day of shock, and you?

Me? Lin Yan couldn't help making fun of her. My name is Mangzhong, which is also a solar term.

She smiled, so naive that he couldn't help laughing with her.

Then, Lin Yan stopped laughing and corrected himself very gently. My name is Lin Yan, and he said, you should remember.

She nodded obediently, well, be sure to remember.

Just like this, but I'm not embarrassed. Lin Yan used to be a poor talker, but she was shocked. She is a dazzling woman, even if she just listens, she is satisfied.

Lin Yan just looked at her, the coffee at hand was cold, but his heart was full of warmth.

When they came to say goodbye to each other, Lin Yan left her QQ number, and she stood by the door and smiled and waved to him.

Such bright eyes are actually straight into people's hearts.

[2]

When they returned to the apartment they shared with Sun, Sun and Xiaoman had already prepared dinner.

After Sun and Xiaoman met at the freshman dance, they soon disappeared for a day. Three years later, they decided that each other was the only one in this life and got married as soon as they graduated.

Xiao Man set the bowl chopsticks while greeting Lin Yan to sit down. Lin Yan called you and left a message asking you to contact her.

Yu Ting, a girl three years younger than him, is a family friend of his hometown, C City. Some things just go with the flow. In his mind, Yu Ting has always been an eccentric girl and has never changed for many years. Before he left for City A, Yu Ting sent him to the station with eager eyes.

You must wait for me, Yu Ting said.

After Lin Yan came to City A, she called her every week and always asked, "How are you, Yu Ting?" ?

Yu Ting just smiled and said, as long as you remember me, that's good.

It's silly, but Lin Yan thinks she still feels warm in her heart. Maybe she really likes it.

Now that Yu Ting is a senior three, maybe she will meet in City A in half a year, but Lin Yan knows it very well and likes it very much. After all, it is not love.

[3]

Lin Yan and Jing Zhe are chatting online. Her ID is her name. Stingo

Occasionally, he said that when we first met that day, her eyes made him temporarily absent.

Shocked, he said, do you know how beautiful you are?

Every word in my heart is nothing more than an excessive meaning, but I suddenly became serious after being shocked.

Beauty can't be eaten as food. Jing Zhi said that if people's requirements for life are only food, clothing, housing and transportation, how can they care about whether the food is delicious or not, and whether there is embroidery on the clothes?

It turned out that I was shocked because I couldn't afford the expensive tuition, so I came out early to experience the bitterness of life.

It turns out that the meager salary of coffee shop is the whole source of her survival in this city.

Lin Yan suddenly became speechless.

I was shocked and a little uneasy to see that he didn't respond for a long time.

Am I being rude? She said, maybe I shouldn't mention some trivial things that have nothing to do with you.

Lin Yan felt a little sour. For a long time, he knocked down eleven numbers on the keyboard.

He said, Jing Zhi, this is my mobile phone number. If you need me, you can call me at any time and anywhere.

[4]

A few days later, Lin Yan received a phone call from Jingzhi, with a slightly tired voice.

I don't go to coffee shops anymore, Jingzhi said. I'll start going to bars tonight. If you are free, you can come and play. Bloom, it's easy to find.

Lin Yan was a little surprised. Why did he go to Bloom? It's very messy there. Is the work in the coffee shop unsatisfactory?

Whether it's good or not, Jing Zhi replied, I'm happy to be at leisure, but I have too little money. Although Bloom is a bit messy, the basic salary plus commission meets my requirements.

Lin Yan, on the other end of the phone, she simply said that if I don't want to do anything, I don't have to do it. That's not the life I can choose now.

One morning a week later, he came to Bloom with Sun and Xiaoman and sat in a corner.

Under the bright colored lights, Jingzhi wore a sapphire backless skirt and shuttled back and forth in the crowd. Occasionally, she looks tired with a hand full of bottles. She wears makeup, bright lip gloss and exaggerated earrings on her small earlobe, showing an enchanting charm.

Looked up and saw Lin Yan, originally lonely cheeks finally lit up.

You came, and she stood in front of him awkwardly.

And watching her skillfully open the wine bill, I finally couldn't help frowning and asked her, do you like it here?

She is stupid, so naturally she doesn't like it.

But after staying for a long time, she tried to smile at him, but she was not used to the sunshine during the day.

I didn't get off work until two in the morning. When I got dressed and came out, I was surrounded by a beautiful girl

Her name is Mu Mu. She smiled and said, she is my colleague who works together.

The air in late spring was still cold, so the five of them casually found a nightclub to eat something, and then said goodbye to each other.

When he left, Lin Yan took off his coat and put it on Jingzhi's shoulder. There was a flash in the quiet eyes, and tears were scattered.

Lin Yan, Jing Zhe said, no one has treated me like this for a long time. I will remember all your beauty together.

[5]

After getting to know each other, Lin Yan often went to Bloom to wait for Jingzhi and Mu Mu to get off work, and then sent them home.

Even, no matter how late at night, Lin Yan won't turn off her phone again, because she is afraid that a casual phone call will delay the call.

On the evening of April Fool's Day, Jing Zhi called him.

Lin Yan, I have a holiday tonight, so I can get off work early. Can you take me to the movies?

Her tone was naive and beautiful, and her clever voice suddenly warmed his ears.

That night, Lin Yan went to Bloom to wait for her in advance. She is obviously in a good mood. She shuttled back and forth, smiling, flying in the sky, occasionally turning around and sticking out her tongue at him playfully.

But Lin Yan didn't expect that when she got off work, a drunken man suddenly blocked her way and grabbed her naked waist. I was shocked, and then tried my best to refuse, but there were unappreciative onlookers cheering loudly, making the drunkard more and more presumptuous. Lin Yan immediately got up and ran, but still.

If you don't get close, there will be bloody liquid splashing.

The white light in the center of the hall suddenly lit up and the crowd quieted down. Eyes stagnate, white and tender chest is deep red. There is a sharp crack in the broken bottle of half a hand, and her black eyes are shining, which is stubborn and fierce that he has never seen before.

Everyone underestimated her, who would have thought that such power was hidden in that petite body.

Lin Yan stood where he was, and his heart had some infarction.

After a while, people began to stir up again and the scene gradually became chaotic. They gaped step by step through the crowd, holding Lin Yan's stiff palm.

Let's go, she raised her still clear eyes and stared at him, easily leaving all the noise behind.

They walked out of Bloom hand in hand. When Lin Yan looked back at that fear, she saw the unbearable lightness of her lips. Heart, she inexplicably became happy, even like a naughty child, pulled tightly and ran away quickly.

They ran faster and faster, and the wind whistling in their ears and the gasps of each other instantly stopped the noise of the world, and everything was silent. Lin Yan suddenly found that all people and things can be left behind, just hope that this moment can hold the soft warmth in his hand.

So running all the way, after a long time, two people stop-and-go, but Lin Yan suddenly burst out laughing, a pair of unscrupulous appearance.

After a moment, he slowly put away his smile and his expression gradually became certain.

Lin Yan looked at her dumbfounded and became my girlfriend.

First, I was surprised, and then I smiled. I know, today is April Fool's Day. Are you kidding?

Lin Yan didn't speak, just leaned over and took out his mobile phone from his bag.

Surprised, I took a closer look, and the screen showed/kloc-0 at 2: 00 on April 2, 5.

"It's not April Fool's Day now," Lin Yan said quietly. "I, Jingzhi, am serious. I want to be with you." .

[6]

After that night, Jingzhe was fired from the bar, and Lin Yan found her in the cabin she shared with Mu Mu.

Let me take care of you, he said.

Scared luggage is very few, and a few clothes are all.

Before he left, Jing Zhe took Mu Mu's hand and took good care of himself. Call me if you need anything.

Mu Mu smoked quietly, but her eyes were full of worries. She leaned against the doorframe to see Lin Yan, which was very kind to her.

[7]

One night, I got a call from Yu Ting.

Yu Ting's voice is still smart. I am going to take the college entrance examination. I'll come to a city after the exam. You're ready to be exploited by me.

He smiled and told her about the exam.

She refused with her head held high. I know all this, Yu Ting said. I can do well in the exam as long as you think of me.

He replied, my brother will miss you.

Yu Ting paused for a moment and asked doubtfully, "When did you become my brother?" ?

[8]

Jingzhe lived with him for a month, and he bought her a diary made of recycled paper in a boutique.

At that time, Jing Zhe had entered the insurance company under the introduction of Xiaoman. She is beautiful and eloquent, and her performance soon went up.

The four of them go to work and attend classes during the day and watch TV and play games together at night, but they also live a peaceful life in An Lan.

The little man has always said that it will be fine for a lifetime.

Until mid-June, Yu Ting called.

I will arrive tomorrow. You can meet me at the station. Yu Ting proudly said at the end, I have estimated the score, and it is no problem to study at a medical university.

In fact, everyone knows that some things can never be avoided, just like he didn't promise Yu Ting any love, but he never explicitly refused her. He always thought he liked her, even a little in love, but now he has a little fright, and he finally caught a glimpse of the truth hidden in the illusion.

In city A in June, the sun stung people's eyes.

Standing next to Lin Yan on the platform, is your sister beautiful? What kind of person is it?

Lin Yan smiled. I'll know when I see you. She's very nice. You must like her.

Wait until the train stops. Yu Ting walked up to them in a suspender skirt. Lin Yan took her backpack and said to her, my girlfriend, call my sister-in-law.

However, Yu Ting's smile faded away and her face suddenly turned pale. Yu Ting's eyes filled with tears.

Say, Gu, how can you be so cruel?

Lin Yan was speechless. When he looked back again, he was shocked, but his eyes were silent.

[9]

Yu Ting Waugh kept crying in her room. Gu, how could you do this? You said you would wait for me, but you fell in love with someone else?

Lin Yan sat silently, but she didn't know how to comfort her. He tried to hug her, but she pushed her away. She stared at her red eyes and burst into tears.

You go away, Yu Ting raises a finger, I don't want to see you, you can't touch me with your hugging hand, I feel dirty!

She waved her arms hysterically and her words were bitter.

Lin Yan finally gave up all his efforts and turned and walked out of the door, but outside, there was no trace of panic.

His heart sank and he had an ominous premonition. Xiaoman said with complicated eyes that he had gone to Mu Mu, and she wanted you to appease Yu Ting. Besides, I hope you can make a decision as soon as possible.

Lin Yan, Xiao Man said, love never has the best of both worlds, only both lose.

[ 10]

It was not until the third night that Yu Ting gradually calmed down, so Lin Yan hurried to the hut where she took away the fright.

Knocking on the door, Mu Mu looked at him coldly, and finally asked indifferently, didn't you promise to treat her well when you took her away? So now, have you done it? Before he could answer, he saw the frightened figure and slowly walked out of the back room.

She looks haggard. She hasn't seen her for days. Her cheeks are slightly sunken. No tears, no unnecessary questions, but her voice is infinitely weak.

Lin Yan, she asked him, do you have a choice?

He didn't speak, just stepped forward and held her in his arms.

The fear in his arms trembled into a dead leaf. Should I give you up? Or, you didn't belong to me, just walked with me for a while, but Lin Yan said, how can I forget you?

I forbid you to forget me. He suddenly became anxious and in a daze. Do you remember the promise you made? You said you would remember all my kindness to you.

Say that finish, he gently let go of her and took out a mobile phone from the pocket. Nokia 3 100.

I was going to send you on Tanabata, but now I can't wait. I have chosen the number, you can take it with you every day, so that I can find you at any time and don't disappear silently. You know, I'll be worried.

He reached out and wiped away her tears.

Then, a velvet box was handed to her.

This was originally a gift for you on Tanabata, but I think it's better to tell you my thoughts now.

There is a ring in the box, which matches his eyes.

Marry me, thorn.

[ 1 1]

In early September, Yu Ting moved into the school dormitory. She always looks on coldly when she gets along with Jingzhe. She said contemptuously, why are you with me? You have nothing. Lin said he would get lost sooner or later.

I didn't argue with her at first, but later I spent more and more time with her. I just exhaled a cigarette gently, and then smiled. Yes, I have nothing but Lin Yan.

[ 12]

At the beginning of the new semester, Sun and Xiaoman have become senior students, and soon they will go to social practice and a distant and unfamiliar bustling city.

The night before he left, Lin Yan asked in horror, Why don't you come and play with us?

She smiled and refused. You have your business and I have mine. I'm running a big client recently. If I can take it off, I can have a good rest.

Their fingers are locked, he whispered. Everything I do is to make you happy in the future.

His words were so touching that she kissed his lips in the dark, wet and warm.

This is the first time that I like someone so much. I don't know what to do, so I like to lose.

I was shocked to think that I couldn't let him go anyway, so I loved him deeply, at all costs. Even if one day, he wants to abandon her, fall in love with another woman, and hunt for the tenderness of others, she will not blame or resent. She will still be grateful to him and walk alone in this lonely world with the joy he left behind.

Love is kindness and a gift. Love is tolerance and the original fault.

On the pillow, Lin Yan likes to talk about it. On that day, I saw green fields and dense forests on the roadside in the suburbs, ponds and muddy paths in the countryside, and poultry and wild dogs on the roadside. At that time, I thought, if there is a place where I can stay with the fright without any interruption, then I would like to knit with a simple life.

He didn't know that she suddenly shed tears in the silent darkness.

She called him Gu.

He turned around. What?

Her hands were in a circle, and she said clearly in his ear, Gu, I love you.

This is a word he has never heard before. In a trance, it seems like a hundred years have passed. After a while, he finally woke up.

We're leaving tomorrow. He kissed her on the forehead, so I'll call you before I come back, okay?

[ 13]

It was one afternoon a month later, Yu Ting was awakened from her nap by the ringtone of her mobile phone, and Lin Yan's voice sounded in her ears when she was sleepy.

Do me a favor, Yu Ting, said Lin Yan. Yesterday, I called Jingzhi and told her that we would arrive tonight and asked her to pick us up. However, something happened and we had to put it off for one day. Now Jingzhi's cell phone is disconnected, would you please tell her for me?

Yu Ting refused on purpose. I don't care what I do.

Lin Yan became anxious. Hao, I beg you, okay?

Yu Ting had never heard of Lin Yan's earnest request, and her heart suddenly became angry, but in the blink of an eye, she agreed directly.

Yu Ting clenched her cell phone hard. Well, she tried to say quietly, I'll help you this time.

Lin Yan at the other end of the phone suddenly became happy. Before hanging up, he thanked him again and again and told him the time and place. Make no mistake, Lin Yan said.

Well, I see, don't worry, Yu Ting hangs up heavily.

When I came back from work, I saw Yu Ting waiting for a long time.

Static cheese asked her, do you have something to find Lin Yan?

Yu Ting waved, no, I'm looking for you. Lin Yan called and asked me to tell you that he won't arrive until tomorrow, and your mobile phone can't get through.

Surprised smile, the phone is dead, it's really troublesome for you.

What does it matter? Yu Ting also smiled. By the way, Lin Yan asked me to tell you that tomorrow night at 9: 40, East Station, don't forget.

[ 14]

To Lin Yan's surprise, when they returned to City A and walked out of the station, they saw Yu Ting's long-awaited figure.

Lin Yan asked her in surprise.

I don't know. Yu Ting also looked puzzled. I told her yesterday, but I didn't see her when I got to the station today

That night, Lin Yanku waited until three o'clock in the morning and didn't see her come back. She called her, but her phone was turned off.

Until the next afternoon, he woke up from a series of nightmares, only to see the note on the pillow.

Lin Yan, I'm going to work. I'm really sorry about last night. The company works overtime, so I can't pick you up.

At six o'clock in the afternoon, Jingzhi came back on time, still with a faint smile.

But a few days later, Lin Yan suddenly felt like a completely different person.

Even if she keeps smiling, he can only see illusory happiness. At night, she began to lose sleep all night. Occasionally, he suddenly woke up and saw her black eyes staring at himself motionless.

Suddenly a cold sweat, my heart, tightened up out of thin air.

I also asked why, but I was shocked and refused to answer. Only my eyes are as deep as the sea, and Lin Yan knows the stubbornness of shock. After asking several times, she decided to give up until Yu Ting's birthday two months later.

During the dinner, Jing was always silent. In the end, he suddenly got up and rushed into the bathroom to vomit.

The little man quickly pulled Yu Ting together and caught up with her, only to see her unusually pale face, clutching her chest with his hand, looking particularly haggard.

Shocked, Xiaoman opened his eyes. You're not. Are you pregnant?

I was shocked, but I saw Xiaoman take out a pack of pregnancy test sticks from his bag. This was left by my classmate. You should test it quickly. If so, you should discuss with Lin Yan what to do.

A few minutes later, the test paper results came out. Xiaoman stood still, but Jingzhe and Yu Ting were both red-eyed.

Yu Ting's tears fell down and she sighed. You finally won. Turn around and walk.

When we returned to dinner together, Xiaoman calmed down for a while, frowned at Lin Yan, and then accompanied Jingzhi to the hospital when she was free.

What happened to her? Lin Yan stood up nervously.

She may be, uh, pregnant with your child.

In this abrupt scene, Lin Yanqing's face suddenly twitched horribly. The veins stood out on his back. He stood up and turned away like crazy, but she let him go without saying a word, her eyes full of despair.

I don't remember how long it was. When they stopped, next to them was the coffee shop where they first met.

Lin Yan's voice sounds like colic spreading. Whose evil seed is hidden in your stomach? !

But Jing Zhi bit her lip and opened her eyes, but she couldn't say a word.

Who would have expected that the rain language and the fear of staying together every night are as clean and beautiful as children except kissing.

No wonder she can't sleep at night because he has returned to a city. No wonder she kept silent when he asked.

It all seemed to come to an abrupt end.

Lin Yan's tears rolled down.

When she was shocked, all the light in her eyes burned to ashes in an instant.

There was no redemption or resentment. She just kept looking at him and looked at him until she looked dry and sad.

He finally burst out laughing, laughing so sadly, and then let go of his hand and refused to leave.

Jingzhi, I don't want to see you again in my life.

[ 15]

Four years later, and attended the wedding of Sun and Xiaoman.

When the ball thrown by Xiaoman fell into his arms, Sun played a joke and soon found a good day to marry it. I've been waiting for you for 20 years.

Lin Yan smiled too, yes, as soon as possible. Looking over, I just saw Yu Ting's gentle smiling face.

For four years, he held the scar tissue to prevent anyone from peeping. The frightened betrayal is a dagger inserted into his heart, and he has enough endurance to wait until the clouds open and the moon is bright, so tell him firmly that I can wait. I don't mind you settling for second best, I don't mind that you have loved others, no matter how long, I can wait.

She really didn't put any pressure on him. She even gave up her major to help him start a company and run a business. There is something wrong with Lin Yan's cash flow. She goes to her clients day and night to collect debts.

At present, his company is on the right track bit by bit, and all his success is inseparable from her efforts.

Just like before, she worked hard all night before entering a city. Only he will always be the driving force for her unremitting efforts.

[ 16]

Six months later, Lin Yan's mother put a jade bracelet on Yu Ting's wrist.

Everything is a foregone conclusion and imperative.

/kloc-in October, they held a wedding.

It was a huge feast, just as he wanted to be shocked many years ago, but in the ups and downs of the crowd, he suddenly caught a glimpse of a familiar face.

It turns out that Mu Mu, which I haven't seen for a long time, suddenly came like the tide.

He walked over in some surprise, briefly, for many years, okay?

But Mu Mu looked away coldly. It's good. My husband works in your company. Thank you for your trouble.

He nodded and hesitated for a long time, but he couldn't help talking. He was shocked. Is she okay?

Mu Mu finally looked back at him, but it was a sad smile. You still remember her. You haven't looked for her in four years. I thought you'd forget who she was.

The next second, Mu Mu hid his face and wept bitterly. She has been dead for four years. The night after you turned around, she was as drunk as a fiddler in the bar, but she still called your name for you to go home, but at a crossroads with heavy traffic, she was caught under the car by an oncoming truck. ...

The truth of the original facts is often not revealed until many years later.

When Mu Mu shook his arm in tears, Lin Yan said that it was all thanks to your good wife. The night you came back from your internship, she tricked you into going to the East Station, but she ran to the West Station to pick you up. Jingzhi stood alone at the station until the early morning. When all the lights went out one by one, she met the bastard who had her head blown off in the bar. He raped her, and the baby in her belly belongs to that bastard, you know! Lin Yan, you always said you loved her. What if her baby isn't yours?

What is unacceptable about this relationship? Why? ! Why did you leave her?

At that moment, his chest burst open.

[XVII]

Lin Yan was smoking, while Yu Ting sat quietly, weeping in the smoke.

Yu Ting, Lin Yan said, I don't blame you, because you didn't mean to. I can't forgive myself. Why didn't I grab her hand and ask carefully? Why is it so easy to assume that she turned her back on herself? So even if I'm alone in this life, I deserve it.

Yu Ting buried her face in the palm of her hand and cried. Her crying gradually turned into powder in the thin air.

Yu Ting said, Lin Yan said, if life can be repeated, then I am willing to give up and retreat, and use one person's loneliness to make two people happy, but it is too late, nothing is too late. ......

A life full of holes can no longer be pieced together.

Six months later, Lin Yan sold her hard-working company and opened a small bar called "March Panic".

The door of the bar was painted with a faint blue paint: we can only survive by snuggling up.

The dead are gone, only memories will last forever.

Lin Yan remembers the first day when we met. When he opened the door of the coffee shop, he saw Jingzhi standing behind the counter with a smile.

Black eyes, soft long hair and slightly raised lips look peaceful and quiet.