Straight male cancer test in fortune telling.
1. Is it a shame not to have been in love?
Every time I call my mother, I can't avoid this question. Since graduation, she has been more concerned about my love life than my physical condition and work. My mother's spell came from-
"Remember to eat and sleep early."
become
"Are there any good girls around recently?"
For my mother's urging, I often have no choice but to say to her: Mom, I haven't even talked about your son's serious love. Now you expect your son to find it for you at once, and where to find it.
And my mother at that time, will be particularly unhappy to interrupt me:
Talk to everyone, especially in front of relatives and neighbors. Don't say you haven't talked about it. Awkward. By the way, don't say this in front of girls, or you will scare people away.
Every time I talk about this topic, I can be nagged by my mother for a long time. After all, many years ago, a fortune teller told her that your son was getting married at the age of 26 and had a broken finger. I have at least two years. What's the hurry?
About all my good friends, they all showed incredible expressions the moment they learned about my blank love experience. It's like seeing some strange alien creatures. In their cognition, only those boys who lead a sloppy life, are disheveled and have low emotional intelligence can't find a girlfriend. I don't look like I've never been in love.
In this way, they will naturally begin to doubt my sexual orientation, so I have to explain to them very reluctantly and tirelessly my experience of being lovelorn, rejected and embarrassed since childhood. Even so, they are only dubious.
Anyway, in front of my friends, these things about me are not secrets, and even become the talk material that everyone talks about and laughs at at at the dinner table.
And several good friends around me have become three aunts and six grandmothers who are only worried about my love life. They will tell you that love also emphasizes experience and timing, when to hold hands, when to kiss and so on. It's hard for people who haven't experienced it to know.
They will tell you:
When you are asked how many times you have been in love, whether you have been in love or not, you should say it two or three times. Too little will make people think that you are problematic or unattractive, and too much will make people think that your promiscuity is unreliable. To sum up, 2-3 times is the best and most stable answer.
In front of strangers, chatting always deliberately avoids such topics. When I have to answer, I only give vague answers. I said this answer once a long time ago. Give it an awkward smile. Probably subconsciously, I also think this is some kind of shady bad habit. After all, it is not a glorious thing.
Sometimes I'm glad I haven't been in love.
In fact, as long as you can think of the fantasy of single life, I have probably experienced it.
As small as eating alone, going to the supermarket alone, watching movies alone, moving alone, or even going to the hospital alone to register. Think about it carefully, 24 years is really a long time, and it is not an exaggeration to say that it occupies 1/3 of your life.
Thanks to such a long time of "experience". You said that these things that a person has experienced are not particularly unacceptable in such a long time dimension of 24 years. Perhaps the only thing that makes you unaccustomed is sympathy in the eyes of others.
Sometimes, I am glad that I am alone and have no such worries. I am happy alone, entertaining myself alone and being free. You don't have to calculate the preparation for burning your brain before the arrival of various festivals, and you don't have to guess every day; Attack a girl's mind by innuendo; You don't have to think about cutting it out for one person in your daily time allocation.
In my opinion, love is more important than affection. While sharing the beauty brought by love, you should also bear the responsibility from love. These include pleasing and taking good care of your girlfriend; In addition to thinking about how to be more awesome, you should count her in and plan how to make you two better off.
In my opinion, for a 24-year-old boy, it's just three 8-year-old boys playing together.
It was at my age. Before this, I have seen too many friends around me go through separation, joys and sorrows. I share their happiness and worry about their sadness.
I remember one time a buddy broke up with his girlfriend, and we were going to take our brother for a drink that night. That night we drank so much wine with him that we saw him flustered after being drunk, and an old man was crying and vomiting there. This embarrassed several of our hostess.
I remember what he told me at that time: in fact, I envy you for not being in love.
If he had not lost his mind, he would have seen me roll my eyes.
Now that I think about it, probably everyone has an innocent fantasy about love since childhood. That's your best fantasy about this state of love before you experience real love. As it turns out, these beautiful fantasies will gradually decrease and even be disappointed with your experience. So I can understand what my brother said to me at that time. In fact, I wanted to respond to him at that time: I envy you, too, and I can associate with girls who are different from me.
3. About my view of love
At our age, 24 years old doesn't mean much, but we are really past the age when we can communicate with our preferences and moods.
Think about when I was in college. Few people around want to find someone to fall in love with, because life is too lonely and learning is too boring.
The other is: everyone around me is in love, so I want to talk about it in order not to let others look down on it!
You see, I have a girlfriend/boyfriend, which proves that I am still capable/attractive.
At that time, falling in love often became a kind of capital to show off each other's youth. As for the ups and downs, only the parties themselves know, so we won't say how many of them live a free and dissolute life in the name of falling in love.
In short, at this age, we are more and more cautious about falling in love. Because at this age, falling in love can easily rise to the point of talking about marriage. Therefore, we will think and think about everyone who touches you, and hesitate and hesitate.
Someone asked:
You haven't spoken for so long, aren't you in a hurry?
Urgent, of course, I am also desperate, but what can it do?
Someone also asked: since we haven't talked about it, it's better to talk about it first and accumulate experience. After all, you will lose a lot by going on a blind date like this.
Whatever. Even if I wanted to, that girl wouldn't. What's more, I'm really not a casual person. I don't know if this is the idea of straight male cancer. You want me to fall in love with a girl for practical experience, and then I find it inappropriate. You tell her, in fact, I'm just kidding with you. Sorry, I really can't. Okay, I admit I'm too soft-hearted.
To tell the truth, as far as I'm concerned, I'm not a person who knows how to care about others and know how to talk sweetly, but I'm a person who will care about each other from the heart.
Yes, I am the kind of boy that girls call late straight.
"I want to go to the movies alone tonight."
"Oh, be safe on the road, don't be too late."
If a girl loses her temper and says, "You go, you go"
I'm the one who will really turn around and leave.
If a girl comes to tease me, I don't know whether it's teasing or provocation.
And then go back very seriously
Yes, I'm the kind of boy who can always refuse an olive branch from a girl very accurately.
Probably because I am used to loneliness and afraid of loneliness, I will pay for all my recognized friends around me mindlessly.
I am the kind of person who is kind to me. I will remember it from my heart and respond sincerely.
4. About my views on marriage
Just a few days ago, I began to shake the idea I once held, and I began to suggest to myself that if I still can't find someone after a few years, I might as well find someone to make a living.
This idea is not because I can't stand other people's eyes and urges. But from the inner moral remorse and beating.
To tell you the truth, I'm scared.
As the saying goes, there are three kinds of unfilial, and the last one is the biggest. At first glance, there is nothing wrong, although we all say that in this life, people live for themselves and are responsible for themselves. But to be honest, we can't avoid the ideas, expectations or harshness imposed by our parents.
My mother is not in good health, and she and I both know that when I repeatedly resist her nagging and urge me to find someone, she will say, well, you can't wait until I'm gone, and you can't get married and have children.
In fact, I know this is just an angry remark from her, but I will always keep it in my heart, hold it in my heart, and then I will be afraid, which makes me start to shake my previous thoughts. To put it bluntly, this is a kind of kidnapping from morality, but we can't bear to avoid it and we can't deny it face to face.
Do you think she is wrong? From her standpoint, I hope her son can find someone to "live" with as soon as possible, and then finish what he should do to reassure her. After all, in the concept of the previous generation, everyone wanted to witness any important moment for their children. This is the affection of their previous generation.
I still remember a few years ago in the movie "Leftover Women Are Kings", in which Jin Shijie's father said something to the blind date, which made me particularly impressed. In fact, there is no conflict between the two kinds of family ties, but parents have different views on love. It is said that people who have been single do not mean that they are neglected because of poor conditions, nor do they mean that they want to live a free life. These people often know more about what they want, so they choose to wait and endure the loneliness of this process.
There is no good or bad, only suitable or inappropriate. The word fit is too broad, which varies from person to person and can be measured by standards.
At my age, what I should see most is their generation's post-80s marriage. Through the enthusiastic introduction of relatives and friends, the two sides evaluate each other's families and they try to get along. Time is not long, half a year is enough to finalize everything. These are often incomprehensible to me.
I'm not a party, so I can't jump to conclusions directly. But in my opinion, no matter how enthusiastic people around you are, you have to understand that you are the one who got married, and you have to live on your own after all. If you are unhappy with him, you can stay together for a year or two, but can you stay together for a lifetime?
Perhaps in the matter of urging marriage, boys are stronger in defense and immunity than girls. In girls' places, elders will tell them that once a girl is over 25 years old, she is going downhill and aging quickly. When she was in her twenties, it was not you who picked on others, but others picked on you.
I don't know when it started. Her family has a car and a house, and a decent job has become the reason why I am willing to make do. Since when, he is very nice, and he doesn't smoke, drink or flirt, which has become the reason why I should love him.
This is not an era when people can't live without them. I often tell my friends that the so-called marriage is that two people make a contract for each other, and the idea that you decide to get married is not the so-called time is up and who should be responsible for whom in the traditional concept, but that you firmly believe that the lives of two people must be better than yours. Isn't it? If both of them are worse than you after marriage, then why get married? It's not that I resist marriage, but it doesn't matter if I meet the right person or stay alone all the time.
But no one can force others to accept their own views. After all, some people insist on marrying love, while others are willing to make do and finally live well.
Finally, I'll give you a passage:
We all look forward to a beautiful love and a beautiful marriage, but it is meaningless for two people's lives and two families. So even if it is a little late, it doesn't matter. Before that person appears, I hope that you and I are still the boys and girls who entertain themselves, have a group of stupid friends who share life and death, and have the independence and security to bear loneliness and solve small troubles in life. For anyone who laughs at your singleness, you don't have to feel sour or embarrassed.
You can confidently tell everyone that you don't have to reluctantly accept a stranger and live with a good person.
Finally, a quote from Anthony:
I still wonder why I came to this world and where I will go in the future.
Still think, will there be a person who loves each other?
I think it should be.