How to understand the sentence "give advice, start from the beginning to the end, stop if you can't, don't bring disgrace to oneself"

The meaning of this sentence is to tell the other person the truth and guide him to do good. If he doesn't listen, don't talk again. If he talks too much, he can only say that he brings shame on himself.

From The Analects of Confucius Yan Yuan: "Zi Gong asked his friends, and Confucius said,' Give advice and make suggestions, and be good at making opinions. If you can't stop, don't bring disgrace to oneself. "? Zi Gong asked how to treat his friends. Confucius said, "Good advice guides you. If you don't listen, you will bring shame to yourself. "

In interpersonal relationships, "friend" is the most relaxed one. Friends stress the word "trust", which is the bond to maintain the relationship between the two sides. When dealing with a friend's mistakes, we should convince him frankly and honestly, and explain the benefits from heart to heart, but if he insists on not listening, he will give up. If others don't listen, you will never change bring disgrace to oneself.

This is a basic principle of making friends. Therefore, Tan Sitong, a scholar in the late Qing Dynasty, thought that one friend was the most valuable, and he even advocated transforming the other four with one friend. In fact, what Confucius is talking about here is a kind of recognition and respect for others as the main body.

Extended data:

The Analects of Confucius is a Confucian classic and a collection of recorded essays focusing on memorizing words. As early as the end of the Spring and Autumn Period, when Confucius set up an altar to give lectures, its main contents were initially established; After the death of Confucius, his disciples and re-disciples passed on his remarks from generation to generation, and gradually recorded the words and deeds of these oral quotations, so it was called "On";

The Analects of Confucius mainly records the words and deeds of Confucius and his disciples, so it is called "language". In the Qing Dynasty, Zhao Yi explained: "The speaker, the sage's language, the commentator, and the Confucian discussion." In fact, "Shang" means compiling. The Analects of Confucius refers to recording the words and deeds of Confucius and his disciples and compiling them into books. The Analects of Confucius consists of 20 articles and 492 chapters, of which 444 chapters record what Confucius and his disciples talked about in time, and 48 chapters record what Confucius and his disciples talked about each other.

The Analects of Confucius, as a Confucian classic, is profound and all-encompassing. Its thoughts mainly include three independent and closely dependent categories: ethics-benevolence, social politics-propriety, and cognitive methodology-the golden mean.

Benevolence, first of all, is the true state in people's hearts. The final compromise must be kindness, and this true and kind state is "benevolence". Confucius established the category of benevolence, and then expounded that courtesy is a reasonable social relationship and a norm to treat people and things, and then expounded the methodological principle of the "golden mean" system.

Baidu Encyclopedia-The Analects of Yan Yuan