After the divorce, the man said, "If you are filial to my parents, there will be no contradiction between us." what do you think?
0 10 1
Filial piety should be the best virtue.
However, in today's society, these two words have almost become a sharp knife in the relationship between husband and wife. Some people drive their partners away with ignorance, while others obey their parents and make their lovers feel cold.
There are both men and women who destroy the relationship between husband and wife because of ignorance and filial piety, but it is undeniable that when the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law are in conflict, it is more common for men to ignore or even hurt their wives because of their affection.
When there is a contradiction between kinship and intimacy, what relationship should a man maintain first? Everyone has an answer in his heart.
It is inevitable for people who think they are filial to maintain family relations for the first time, because in their cognition: if their wife is gone, they can find another one who is more filial, but if their mother is gone, then they are really gone.
But the consequence of this is often that his wife is gone, and his filial piety has not been fulfilled as he hoped.
0202
Mr. Zhang is a very filial person. Before his marriage, his filial piety was appreciated by many people.
Both the boss of the company and relatives and elders appreciate Mr. Zhang's filial piety and respect for the elderly. Also, after all, in this impetuous society, to be grateful to parents, we must have a good character education.
Filial piety is of course a virtue, but foolish filial piety is another matter.
After marriage, Mr. Zhang's unfilial has seriously affected the relationship between husband and wife, so that his wife wants to divorce him.
What makes Mr. Zhang particularly contradictory is that he loves his wife and does not want to divorce her, but he does not want to adopt parents for a woman.
Basically, in everything in the family, either the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law reach an agreement automatically, or Mr. Zhang forces his wife to obey his mother, which is unfilial.
Mr. Zhang always says to his wife:
"Be patient, the elderly can still live for a few years, and they don't want their children to have no relatives to support them."
"Think more about the elderly. You see that you are not filial to the elderly, and the neighbors look bad. "
"If you love me, you must love my parents, love me, love my dog, be filial to me and make my family beautiful."
"I won't disobey my parents for you. You'd better be more patient yourself. "
……
There are many persuasion like this. In short, Mr. Zhang means: I am a filial person. You must be filial to me, so that we can live in harmony.
It is also because of this idea that when there was a conflict later, Mr. Zhang was the first to stand on his parents' side, scold his wife, teach her a lesson, and let her stand with him and be filial to his parents.
But the more he did, the more his wife argued. Finally, in a contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, the wife angrily filed for divorce, but refused to recover it. She also left a sentence: "In this life, you have lived with your mother."
Mr Zhang Can can't figure out why he knows nothing about being a wife, because everyone appreciates his good character and filial piety.
When recalling these things, Mr. Zhang spoke his mind: "If she can be filial to her parents with me, I believe there is no contradiction between us, and we will be very happy."
The couple got divorced. At first glance, Mr. Zhang's unfilial behavior led to his wife's disappointment, and her unprotected behavior made her feel desperate, so she fell apart.
But the real problem is that Mr. Zhang didn't understand what the most important intimate relationship between parents should be.
0303
It doesn't matter how filial you are before you get married, and it doesn't matter if you are awarded the "filial piety award", but after you get married, your filial piety is not only your own career, but also the small family behind you.
At this time, if all obedience to parents is regarded as "filial piety" or even enforced by the lover, it will be difficult for the married life to be happy and the elderly to provide for the elderly.
You know, nothing is as real as intimacy.
All relationships should make concessions for the relationship between husband and wife, and two people in marriage should first maintain their feelings.
You can't harm your partner's interests for the sake of your parents, let alone force your partner to submit to filial piety.
When two people are together, intimacy is the first priority, because only when the husband and wife have harmonious feelings can they be filial to the elderly on both sides, and vice versa.
0404
My cousin has a particularly strong mother-in-law. She became difficult to get along with as soon as she got married. She made her do all the housework, and even after she got pregnant, she gave a cruel word to her cousin: she must have children.
Later, my cousin gave birth to a daughter, and my mother-in-law winked at people. The next month, she was even more cynical about her cousin and ignored her granddaughter. She is a typical representative of the evil mother-in-law in reality.
But under the pressure of such an evil mother-in-law, my cousin still insists on her marriage for only one reason: her husband always puts her first.
Even in the past years, my mother-in-law was bullied, but every time, my cousin always stood with her cousin, and she never let her cousin feel wronged.
It is also because my cousin has always maintained the relationship between husband and wife, so my cousin is always hot pillow about her marriage and doesn't care about her mother-in-law's difficulties.
In a blink of an eye, my cousin reached middle age and her children grew up, but her mother-in-law was in poor health and needed someone to take care of her.
Looking back on what my mother-in-law did in the early years, my cousin should drive her out of the house now and deal with her like she did with you, but her husband begged her cousin, "No matter how bad it is, it's my mother." How can I bear to watch her suffer? "
After careful consideration, my cousin finally decided to bury the hatchet and do her last filial piety for her husband.
My cousin's husband, because he maintained the relationship between husband and wife in the early stage, finally got a happy marriage and did his unfinished filial piety; Cousin is willing to shake hands with her "enemy" because she has such a man who loves her.
0505
There are so many unfilial daughters-in-law, all of which are forced out.
A woman marries not to quarrel with her mother-in-law, but to face the storms of life with her lover, including supporting the elderly.
And many men, always can't tell the order of affection and intimacy, make a mess of a beautiful marriage. In the end, they got married for nothing without filial piety.
You know, no woman is willing to humbly please her mother for a man who doesn't cherish herself.
More, this man deserves her filial piety to her parents.
Men want their wives to be filial. First of all, he must understand that his wife has no obligation to be filial to your parents. It's all mutual affection. In-laws are good to their daughters-in-law, and husbands are good to their wives. How can a woman be unfilial?
What I am most afraid of is that men ask their wives to be filial to their parents, which is forcing their wives to carry it out. When there is a conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, not only do they not keep close relationship, but they also accuse women of being unfilial. Why should such men and women be filial to your parents? How much are you worth?
Marriage is the feng shui of a family. Only when husband and wife live in harmony can the family be happy, the elderly can have a retired life and the children can have a healthy growth environment.
So in everything, please consider the person who wants to spend the rest of his life with you.