Excuse me, big brother and big sister in Xining, about the engagement.
Employment: The date of giving the bride price should be decided by both men and women. The amount of dowry depends on the social fashion at that time and the man's economic situation. On the day of the bride price, all the men in the man's house and the men of the man's relatives were led by the matchmaker to the woman's house to send the bride price, which was mainly composed of several sets of clothes, several bags of tea, some money, cosmetics and jewelry. After arriving at the woman's house, the woman's house hosted a banquet. After dinner, the matchmaker and the representative of the man's parents paid the bride price one by one. At the same time, the woman returned 1 clothes, a new hat, a pair of embroidered socks and a belt to her son-in-law. Since the 1980s, there have been many kinds of bride price, including bicycles, watches, gold earrings, gold rings and so on. The total value of bride price given by rich households is about 20 thousand yuan.
Marriage: Weddings are usually held in winter and off-season. As soon as the wedding day arrived, the groom went to the woman's house by a close relative, a married young man, surrounded by the man's relatives and friends. First, the woman's elders put on a new hat and an embroidered belt for the groom, and then the man's relatives put on red to congratulate the groom. Then, the groom walked into the room and sat opposite the imam. Imam reads the marriage certificate "Nikahai", and the bride combs her hair up and down three times in the boudoir by her aunt or relatives. Next, put on a hat, tie the hijab into a bun, and cry loudly to show goodbye and good luck. After "Nikahai", the groom said "al-Salam" to his elders under the guidance of the best man.
The imam scattered red dates, walnuts and a greasy food called "Guma" on the kang table into the yard, and all the people present scrambled to eat it, thus ending the wedding. On the same day or the next day, when the bride gets married and dresses, she will cry and sing "Sahes", supported by her relatives, and go out with tears in her eyes. At the same time, she will scatter her wheat on the ground and walk around the horse. In crying, she will be married with the help of her uncle and brothers, and escorted to the man's house by bridesmaids and relatives and friends. On the way, the farewell party was received by lovers in this village or other villages, asking them to send their relatives to dinner and drink the oil they prepared to stir jiaozi's tea, expressing their gratitude. At the door of the man's house, the bride's elders lifted the bride from the horse to the kang of the new house, and the groom's sister-in-law or aunt lifted the veil from the bride's head with new chopsticks. Salar people are called "Brazilian Assi", and at the same time, they drink to the bride's rooting, flowering, fruition and harmonious life. I also brought a basin of water to ask the bride for lucky money. The bride threw the coin into the water to show that it was as innocent as water, and the coin took root. In the Salar nationality, it is called "Gejiljoy". After that, the woman presented the bride with a dowry and a gift to the man's closest relative and aunt. The man also sent sheep backs, materials and cash to the relatives of the woman, which is called "farewell" in the Salar nationality to express his gratitude. When getting married at an early age, the woman's elders or invited artists say a wedding greeting, asking her in-laws to take care of the bride and wishing the bride and groom a long life together. He also performed the camel dance "Sorry for appointing Ao Yina" to tell the story of ancestors' migration. On the third day after marriage, the bride and groom will return to their parents' home and be warmly treated by the woman.
This is the custom and procedure of Qinghai people from engagement to marriage.