Zhihu High Fever: You can see the characteristics of an only child at a glance
I am an only child
My roommate said that she knew I was an only child the first day I entered the dormitory.
As I got along slowly, I discovered that I was indeed very different from the other non-only children in the dormitory.
For example, our dormitory manager, who is the youngest in the family, is very good at taking care of others and her behavior is more diplomatic.
She never minded us swarming around her bed and making a mess.
Every time we go out, we bring snacks because my sister at home has always done the same.
Whenever there are disputes in the dormitory, she usually plays the role of peacemaker and can always get away with it.
Looking back at myself, I think there are only a handful of things I can do above.
Growing up, I slept alone, did housework alone, and went to school alone.
I don’t like others taking over my territory, but I also want to play with others.
I am independent and like to be taken care of by others. I welcome others into my world. I feel crowded for a long time.
On the one hand, I feel that it would be very troublesome to have a sibling who is trying to rob me of things with me, but on the other hand, I feel that it would be easier to have a companion to support my parents in their old age.
As an only child, many of my thoughts and behaviors are very different from those of other students in my dormitory.
1 The behavior is more direct.
When I call home, I discuss the family’s shortcomings with my parents like an adult.
When the daughter of Zhang San’s family got married, the red envelope had to be bigger. My grandfather was sick and his family came to visit.
Li Si wanted to ask our family to borrow money, but I said I wouldn’t lend him money. His family didn’t pay back the money they borrowed from his aunt.
Such as this, I am the only child in the family, so my parents never shy away from me when discussing issues.
Before, I told my dad that I wanted to go on a trip with my boyfriend. As soon as I finished talking, I saw my roommates’ jaws dropped to the ground in surprise.
In short, there are not so many taboos in speech, and I can say what I want and speak more straightforwardly.
Financially, my family always tries its best to meet all my needs.
Because there are no other children, my parents don’t have to worry about one thing at the expense of the other. Everything they buy belongs to me.
Dad told me early in the morning that he worked diligently to save money, and all the money will belong to me in the future.
I have always saved and spent the money given by relatives and friends during the Chinese New Year since I was a child.
When my roommate puts something on my desk, I don’t think too much about it. I just tell her that I don’t like other people putting things on my desk all the time.
2 Strong personality
In "Reply 1988", because Lidshan is the second child in the family, her parents always unconsciously ignore her needs.
The poached eggs are always given to the sister and brother first, the fried chicken legs are always divided between the sister and the brother, and even the birthday cake can only use the leftovers from the sister.
Deshan was always modest in the beginning, giving up the eggs to his sister and brother. If he couldn't eat chicken legs in the fried chicken, he would eat chicken wings.
In my family, this situation will basically be nipped in the bud the first time.
Because I am neither humble nor willing to fight for anything.
I have no concept of humility. My philosophy is that what belongs to me belongs to me, and I give it to you because I like you.
I neither understand nor feel disgusted with people who frequently ask for things.
Because I know exactly what I want, so I won’t let anyone influence my choice.
We planned to spend New Year's Day together in the dormitory before, but everyone was talking about it and couldn't explain why, and then couldn't make a decision.
I will directly choose the place, arrange accommodation, plan the route, determine the price, and then directly ask them if it is okay.
If not, just arrange everything like me and give everyone something intuitive, don’t just talk without practicing.
Usually in this situation, everyone finds that they neither know the address nor the price, let alone arrange accommodation.
But this also has disadvantages. If I make the arrangements, it will definitely be in accordance with my preferences, which will inevitably harm some interests of others.
3 Possessive
Only when I went to college did I realize that I didn’t like sharing things with others.
I didn’t realize it before, until one time my roommate asked me very seriously: Why do I give you snacks every time, but you never give them to us?
In my mind, I am not in the habit of dividing a pack of snacks into several small portions and then giving them to everyone.
I think it would be better to just give out one packet per person. Giving out snacks little by little makes me look petty.
So when there is only one pack of snacks, I will not give out food to everyone.
Of course, no one is right or wrong. Later, I shared the snacks like everyone else. After all, being sociable in the dormitory is the most important thing.
When going to the library, I prefer to find a secluded place to do homework and read books by myself. If someone comes to sit down, I hope that he will not make any big moves.
If he shakes the table or plays on the computer, I will basically sit somewhere else.
Later, I gave up studying on the lower floors of the library and climbed to the fourth floor every time to study at the desk where I applied.
Put something distinctive about yourself in front of your desk to prevent others from sitting in my seat.
4 Be more confident
As someone said before, I have nothing to do every day, but I don’t know where the confidence comes from. I always feel that I will succeed in the future.
But sometimes it’s good to have confidence. When I failed the college entrance examination, I didn’t feel stupid or embarrassed my parents.
I just need to work harder to make up for my shortcomings in academic qualifications and find a good job.
Be confident, for no reason, I feel that your hard work will yield results.
I have no worries about anything I do, and I firmly believe that my parents will support and tolerate me.
My parents instill in me every day that I am the baby of the family, which I feel is good for love.
Only when he devotes himself to me like a parent can I hold him in my eyes.
It’s not like a puppy, you can trick me away by just giving me a piece of meat and a few bones.
In the same way, you can also be more aware of the kindness others treat you, and then feedback it to the other person tenfold or a hundredfold.
It’s the same as a sentence I saw in a book: The loved one can recognize love best and cherish love the most.
I actually don’t think the difference between us comes from whether we are only children, nor do I think there is anything to envy about each other.
Different living environments will always give birth to all kinds of strange characters.
Therefore, whether you are an only child or not, you need to work very hard to make others feel that your efforts are effortless.
Life is fair, and I have also discovered how lucky I am through countless complaints about my only child, enjoying so much love that others cannot enjoy.