Wei Zi likes her brain.

I think it is necessary for everyone to have a deep understanding of what is the love brain and what will happen if it is dominated by it. Only when we realize that this thing is harmful and useless can we have the motivation to avoid it, because people are more or less selfish and tend to make choices that are beneficial to them.

First, the love brain: there is only love in my mind.

Love the brain, as the name implies, is full of love (or boyfriend), no job, no friends, let alone self. Mapping to the life scene is "he said it doesn't matter if I work or not", so I treat my work perfunctory and just want to chat with each other all day, "why haven't you returned my message"; Or "My boyfriend is my best friend, and I can tell him all my whispers, except him, I seem to have no friends", and friends can only shake their heads and walk away after listening; Or "I'm good-looking and photogenic, and I want to try the live broadcast sideline business of e-commerce with goods, but my boyfriend says he doesn't want me to show up, so forget it, feelings are the most important."

Such scenes are everywhere in the real life of loving the brain. What will happen in the end? We can imagine that she has never been promoted and raised in her career. 1978 broke up with her boyfriend and is still working at the grassroots level; The circle of communication is getting smaller and smaller, and I can't live without my boyfriend every day. There will naturally be many contradictions. Finally, her boyfriend left, and she felt lonely as never before. Considering her boyfriend's feelings, she put her hobby on hold for a long time and never picked it up again. She doesn't even have a skill. Taken together, she has become a desert island that is too ordinary, lonely and unable to get along, and it is desolate.

Second, refuse to fall in love with the brain: find your true self

The essence of loving the brain is to take the other person as the center and gradually lose oneself, so the core of refusing to love the brain is self-centered, including self-centered, self-centered, self-centered, self-centered, self-centered, self-centered, self-centered. When you find your true self, no matter who comes or goes, it's just an experience, and it won't make you an island at all, because you have a career, socialization and hobbies, and you are still a colorful and complete you.

Take my feelings as the center, that is, control my emotions, and don't be easily influenced or influenced by the other party. The best situation is to abandon 300 questions: "Why didn't he return my message?" Focus on what you are doing, as long as you are not in a hurry, no matter when he comes back, don't wait. In addition, don't send WeChat in an emergency. It seems that calling directly can better avoid sleeping without returning messages.

Focusing on self-growth, that is, the purpose of being together is for two people to support each other and make progress together, rather than self-consumption and self-retrogression. If a relationship makes you sensitive, suspicious, lazy and bad-tempered, it must be that the other party has not given you a sense of security, positive motivation and qualified emotional value, so there seems to be no need to continue. If you want to do something but haven't done it yet, do it boldly and tell the other person. If the other party has pertinent opinions or suggestions, you can consider listening. But if it is simple feelings and emotions, it can be ignored.

Being self-centered, that is, after being with the other person, you will still give your precious time to your family, friends and work team from time to time, just because your date has one more choice. You don't need to be with each other all the time, because your family, friends and work team also need your company, so tell each other from the beginning not to try to ask you to be with him.

Focus on your own career, that is, work as hard as you did when you were single, achieve promotion and salary increase, and prove your social value. Even if you encounter fertility problems, don't consider whether to become a full-time mother at all, return to the workplace as soon as possible, and keep in touch with social values. If you have the opportunity, you can say a few more words, "You rest first, and I have to change my plan again."

These are some of my views, hoping to help you. If you have any other comments, please leave a message in the comments section.