Premarital entanglements ...
What you should worry about most is getting along with your future in-laws, because it is very different from their lives in all aspects.
I don't know about your future husband's temper, but as my friend said, you never said a bad word about him from beginning to end. I think he should still win your heart. Can you still say that he is good at dealing with your relationship with his parents? Personally, I think the attitude and handling method of husband between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is really important. . . . .
In fact, it is the same for people to get along with each other, and they change their hearts with each other. The same is true with mother-in-law. Treat her as my own mother. This is what I have been trying to do. Although it is a bit difficult, I think I can always get along with it with my heart and efforts. So is the mother-in-law. If she can treat her daughter-in-law as her own daughter, she will get along well. Of course, this is not easy. Take me for example, I am three brothers and sisters. I am the youngest, and there are two brothers on it. My second brother is at home, living with my parents, and my mother is also my mother-in-law. Hehe, sometimes she will tell me a little grievance. In fact, it's all small things, so I told her, "Mom, you treat your sister-in-law as your own daughter." They have been living together, which I think is quite good. My mother also thinks my second sister-in-law is quite good as a whole. We can get along well every day, let alone meet once in a while.
Give you some advice:
1. His parents came to Shanghai to play before, which made the room dirty and messy, and they didn't pay attention to hygiene, so their living habits were quite different. BF said that they should come less in the future, and we should go back and see more. But who knows what will happen later?
I don't think you will live together for long. Can't you stand coming here once in a while?
It's true that living habits are very different, but I feel like you don't like it.
I remember my eldest sister-in-law came to my house for the first time. In winter, she sat on my mother's bed with my parents, my eldest brother, me and five people, covered with quilts, chatting. My hometown is the countryside. My eldest brother settled in Zhongshan, and I lived in Nanjing. It was not until very late that they went back to their room upstairs to sleep. Later, my mother was always very happy, because she said that my eldest sister-in-law didn't dislike her and was willing to sit under the bed with her. I still mention it occasionally. In fact, my parents' room is also quite messy. I often help them clean when I am at home.
It happens that my parents are staying at my eldest brother's house these days. My mother said that she couldn't even mop the floor and didn't even dare to turn on the gas stove. She said that it is different from home, and every day is full of fun. She said my sister-in-law bought her this and that.
I think it might be better if you could be considerate. They may be used to it in the countryside.
Decades of habits can't be broken at once.
And it can be seen from your future husband's handling that he is very considerate of you.
2. His mother told me last year that BF had a bad relationship with his family, which was not good for them. But BF insisted on staying with me, and finally his mother had to accept me. This incident made me have a bad impression on his family!
Again, understand more. When my eldest brother talked to my eldest sister-in-law, my mother firmly opposed it. I was still in junior high school at that time. My mother stares at me every day to separate them. There is no other reason to say that my sister-in-law's house is too far away. Later, my sister-in-law wrote to my parents, and my mother was very moved. When the second brother got married, my mother also made peace with their birthdays. As for me, it is said that my mother-in-law also asked the fortune teller if we were suitable. We are all fine now. Please understand the elderly. She is not really dissatisfied with you. So there's no need to keep obsessing, even if it's because of this.
His mother wants us to go back to my home for the Spring Festival this year, and go to his home next year, that is, once a year, just to be fair. Although BF didn't promise, I know I will get into trouble because of these things in the future.
It is understandable that parents want their son and daughter-in-law to go home for the New Year. . . . . .
Moreover, this is only their hope, not mandatory. There's nothing to struggle with.
It is estimated that it may not work in practice. There are many people in the New Year, but as a junior, it is human nature to go home once a year. If your boyfriend is their only child, they should go back and have a look.
The living habits of his parents and I are so different. If I have children in the future, it is hard for me to accept my mother-in-law to bring them to me. I can only rely on my own parents. I feel very reluctant to let my parents work for me, and some are unwilling!
You chose not to be taken care of by your mother-in-law. Why don't you make up? Now many children are brought up by grandparents.
Many people want their parents to take care of their children. Don't bother his parents too much, it will be very bad.
Finally, I hope to remind everyone to be considerate of each other. Because I am also the daughter-in-law of others, and my mother is also my mother-in-law, I have experienced it personally. It is also very good to get along with your husband after marriage, so that he can feel warm and feel your warmth to his family. I will always remember my parents' birthdays, and I will remind my husband on Father's Day and Mother's Day, so make a phone call. I'll remind you for a while. Have you talked to your parents recently? Something like that . . . In fact, these are very small things, but
But you can get different results. You can take care of your parents, don't be stingy with his parents.
Let's go . . . . . . . . . .