Why are many girls now afraid of having children?

Isn’t it said that giving birth to a child is like going through hell? It can be seen that giving birth to a child is a scary thing for women. So many girls are afraid of giving birth. But giving birth to children is a woman’s responsibility and obligation. Many women have a child due to family pressure after getting married. It can be regarded as a contribution to the passing on of incense in the family. But after giving birth to the first child, many women no longer want to have a second child. That's because they may really feel the difficulty and hardship of giving birth to a child. During the tenth month of pregnancy, you have to endure a lot of suffering and hardship. You should carefully take care of the fetus in your belly every day. Not only to prevent your own physical health, but more importantly, to protect the fetus in your belly from harm. Waiting on tenterhooks, after 10 months of fetal development. In one move, one has to go through greater pain to give birth to the fetus smoothly. Of course, there is nothing to say about being able to give birth naturally during childbirth. Mainly those who have difficult labor, are unable to give birth on their own, and require surgical caesarean section. That makes people feel tormented and painful. Not only is the body suffering, but the child's health is also a constant concern. So it is not easy to give birth to a child.

Some women are prone to develop some gynecological diseases after giving birth to children. This time is no longer suitable for pregnancy and childbirth. If we talk about forced pregnancy and childbirth again. Not only are adults in a dangerous situation, but it is also easy for children. No security. If something unexpected happens, it will be easy to defeat both the wife and the soldiers. This would be a huge loss to a family. So women who are no longer fit to bear children. The reluctance to have a second child is something we can understand and support.

Moreover, after giving birth to children now. Spend money on children in every aspect. Prices are much higher now than before. If the family's economic conditions are good, they can still afford the children's consumption expenditure. I said that it is easy for those with average family conditions to be unable to support consumer spending. In this way, the birth of a child puts a certain amount of pressure on the family's economic conditions. This is also an important reason why many women are unwilling to have children.

After giving birth to a child, I lose my freedom, my job, my financial strength, my rest time, my appearance, my health, and I am even more afraid of losing my love, my spiritual support, and my love. Source of Life

Yes, yes, yes, very scared, very scared.

As we all know, when a woman gives birth to a child, she is really going through hell.

People who are lucky will go and see it and come back, but people who are unlucky will go there and never come back.

Giving birth to a baby will not only cause stretch marks and make you look ugly, but more importantly, it will put your life at risk. Two women I know died because of giving birth to children. It is really sad to say this.

When I used to work in Hangzhou, I met a fellow countryman. She delivers milk to me every morning. The relationship was okay once she got acquainted with her. Her first child was a daughter, who was already seven years old, and she planned to have a second child.

That year, she was 33 years old and preparing to have a second child. At that time, we all suggested that she give birth in Hangzhou:

First, the medical conditions in Hangzhou are much better than in her hometown.

Second, her husband works in Hangzhou and can take care of her.

Hey, I didn’t expect that her husband insisted on her returning to her hometown to give birth alone. Later, she suffered a massive hemorrhage and passed away during the birth. Her son lost his mother just after he was born...

Hey, less than a month later, His husband brought another woman back for a month. What this man did was so chilling.

There is another woman, she is the daughter of a professor in our school, in the United States.

Because of changes in her family, she planned to have another child. Her eldest son was already in high school...

She was still in a private hospital run by a Taiwanese in the United States. An accident occurred and no one was rescued...

These two incidents, and I knew both of them, made me very frightened, really.

——Fortunately, medical conditions are getting better and better now, so female friends can relax.

As a senior who fears pregnancy, let me share my views:

First, giving birth is really painful.

My pain level is very low. I usually feel excruciating pain when I have a small wound or blood draw.

Moreover, I have gone to the hospital to see my colleagues and friends who had just given birth. After several caesarean section, I was so painful that I wanted to roll over in the hospital bed. This made me have thoughts about giving birth. Deep fear.

Second, Xiaojia is not ready yet, either mentally or materially.

I have been married for less than two years. The monthly mortgage, car loan, water, electricity, property, and parking fees all add up to 80 of my two salaries. I really don’t have much money saved.

Furthermore, my husband is an only child, and I also feel that I am still young. I am still a baby. What will I do if there is another one?

Third, I haven’t played enough yet.

When I was studying, I was focused on studying. I just wanted to get good grades, get into a good university, and then find a good job. I really didn’t have the time, energy, or money to go out and explore.

Now that I am working, I have time on weekends, and I have a certain amount of travel expenses. I always want to try something I haven’t done before, places I haven’t been to before, and see things I haven’t done before. The scenery I have seen.

Fourth, I feel unsure.

After giving birth to a child, your current life will inevitably be disrupted, your current work and life will change, and some sacrifices will be made.

You may need to live with your mother-in-law, you may need to quit your job for the sake of your children, and there may be conflicts between husband and wife.

Too much uncertainty has always made me feel unsure.

Girls today have a strong sense of independence. They do not think that women are just child-bearing machines. Especially some working women who are highly educated, capable and financially independent. They have worked hard for many years and have a decent job. I don't want to give up my position just because I have a baby, so I delay having a baby.

I think the most important reason is because there is no sense of security. The pain of giving birth is only part of the reason. No matter how painful it is, it is a natural law and girls can still bear it. What scares them most is what to do after the baby is born!

Children are alive after birth, and they need the care of their parents to grow up healthily. Many girls will give up a lot of things after having children, but the fathers of many children not only do nothing, but also accuse the mother of not doing this or that!

After a child is born, a lot of money is needed, and girls basically sacrifice their work after having a child, so they may be financially strapped, and the constant cost of children makes them frown. , if the child's father's family conditions are not good again, the child's father dislikes her spending money randomly and not knowing how to be frugal, and if the girl is thin-skinned, it is basically foreseeable that she will live in pain!

Compared with having children, girls are more afraid of not being able to see the future.

If you can't see the future, you will be confused, and if you are confused, you will be afraid. Fear will reduce girls' sense of security. Without a sense of security, they will naturally be afraid of having children!

Women have children, which is a gateway of destiny. In the past, women had no status, so the pain of giving birth will not tell you. In a patriarchal society, if too much publicity is given, women will not have children, and men will How can their family name and property be passed down?

Therefore, the patriarchal society is relatively silent about childbirth. Instead, it is about being strong as a mother. If a woman does not give birth to children, her life is incomplete, irresponsible, selfish, etc.

In fact, having children does not mean not to have children, but that women should be given enough safety, protection and respect.

For example, I also saw some comments about why you should give up your seat to a pregnant woman on a bus or subway, since she is not carrying your own child.

Many pregnant women will give up their seats only if they have given birth.

Of course, the money that goes with the child is scarce. Now the status of pregnant women has improved, and the status of the child has also improved, but it is still not enough.

We should not encourage mothers to bully women to have children. Women should be willing to give birth to children, be willing to have children, and be mothers, instead of being slapped with a big label at every turn, which makes people disgusted.

We must respect pregnant women and parturient mothers, and respect and protect stay-at-home mothers.

I read an article the other day. There was a woman and her boyfriend who were still studying. They were pregnant and did not want children. They had to register for an abortion and seek psychological counseling. As a result, there were people waiting at the door every day to advise them not to do so. Abortion can also provide free psychological counseling and financial assistance. At first, the young couple was indifferent, but gradually their hearts melted, and they gave birth to the child and did not choose to have an abortion. After they made the decision, those The person guarding the door gave them a warm hug, and the child was born. As expected, the young parents still felt very happy.

It is true that a woman will suffer for a period of time after giving birth, from the beginning of the pregnancy to the end of the birth, but the happiness brought by the child is enough to make up for it. A family with children running around is very happy. Now Many people mature late. No matter how strong many women are, after a certain age, motherhood naturally comes out. They will like cute children when they see them. It is not easy to have children again. Women should have their own children, but they should not be pressured into saying something, as this will arouse resentment. Today’s young girls have their own personalities, and they are used to making their own decisions. The more forced and preachy they are, the more they will On the contrary, they become more indifferent and lifeless. Given enough care, no woman would not want to have children.

Women in the past were also afraid, but they were tight-lipped and avoided talking about the dangers on the road to childbirth, let alone telling their daughters that they would continue to lie to them for generations, so that their children and grandchildren could be full of genes. (regardless of quality) can be continued.

Nowadays, information interaction is so advanced that it is difficult for women to be deceived.

The fundamental reason why girls today are afraid of having children is because they are just girls and it has not become a tradition. Meaning and psychology of mature woman. Their motherhood has not yet awakened, and they are still unable to realize the importance of marriage, love and childbirth to women's lives. Their most real needs at the moment are to be loved unconditionally, to enjoy material life intoxicatedly, to consume youth without taking any responsibility, and to hope that they will live forever. This continues. If the mind is mature and slow, you are the baby yourself. How to give birth to a baby

This phenomenon has nothing to do with age, but is closely related to the maturity of the mind. It’s not that people will automatically mature and grow up as long as they pass puberty. In fact, girls who are afraid of having children have a stubborn child living inside them. The long period after puberty cannot let this inner child grow up, so We can see that many women in today's society are unwilling to get married, face the tediousness of married life, and are unwilling to go through the test of childbirth.

They always have the characteristics of younger girls in their words and deeds. They add blush and baby fat in the two-dimensional space of the beauty camera, like to put on bunny ears, like to pout, and call themselves babies. I like to play with it, and imitate the cuteness of a four or five-year-old baby girl with a milky sound.

They like all kinds of fancy and beautiful gadgets. When they are in their thirties or forties, they still can’t put it down for puppies, kittens, plush toys, girly colors, girly styles, girly clothes, girly style , girls can continue until menopause.

They like all kinds of pleasures in life, such as where the colors of afternoon tea are beautiful, where the internet celebrity check-in is fun and interesting, where the popular models are comfortable, where the scenery is amazing, which mobile phone is easy to use, where Which hotel is comfortable, which facial mask is more effective, which milk tea has a stronger flavor... All they think about is how to give their bodies and minds the ultimate enjoyment, and how to find a person who can continue the role of their father and become their protection from wind and rain. Lifetime meal ticket.

In their eyes, giving birth to a child means the end of their childhood, the end of a life of unconditional acceptance of pampering, and it means that they must be responsible for another life like adults. people, and pay a certain price. They resist growing up, especially unwilling to give love and responsibility to adults. They want all the love in the world to be their own. People who are too mature and sophisticated lose confidence in love and reproduction

There is a strange phenomenon among adults in today's society, which is the coexistence of abnormal mental regression and extreme evolution in social and emotional intelligence. Mental regression means not wanting to grow up and become a "Tianshan Child Mother"; the extreme evolution of social and emotional intelligence is reflected in the sophistication and sophistication of these people, who can see through people's hearts and have personal intelligence. Complex social relationships make young people mature prematurely, which is not necessarily a good thing. They are scheming, keen on palace fights, care about interests, and are mean and lack sympathy for others. They see more of the darkness of human nature and the difficulties of married life. Failure and therefore adopt a negative and conservative attitude towards emotional life.

They generally believe that love and hate are free, family life is dispensable, and having children is of no value. The only thing they care about is their own interests and not being harmed in this complicated world.

Having a child will undoubtedly create more ties and constraints, which will make them lose their bargaining chip in the game of marriage and put them in a weak position. They view the world with a speculative and changing mentality, and children are undoubtedly a heavy backpack. Constantly depleting one's material accumulation, it also deprives oneself of the possibility of pursuing freedom and striving for a better partner. They don't give birth to children, they just travel lightly and are always on the move.

People who are extremely selfish, self-interested, and self-centered are incompatible with the birth of new life. People who dislike themselves often tend to end the inheritance of life

In traditional society, reproduction is the mission of a person, a family and a generation. In a pluralistic society, there are more opportunities to choose. More and more people would rather have no children and no grandchildren, and would rather consciously choose a lifestyle of no marriage and childbearing.

In addition to the above-mentioned reasons of childishness and sophistication and selfishness, many girls do not have children because of their deep-seated inferiority complex. Some are problems in the family of origin, and some are the stigma of low self-esteem in the process of growing up. Most of them are disappointed with their bodies and feel unsatisfied with their abilities, temperament, appearance, intelligence, etc.

Long-term suppressed emotions and lack of self-acceptance have made this inferiority deeply rooted in the bones. In fact, they are true pessimists. They just live quietly in this world, more or less suffering from depression, anxiety and various personality disorders, with no solution and no motivation to solve it.

This low self-esteem leads them to become unmarried, or DINK.

"I want my disgusting genes to be completely cut off from my generation!"

"I don't have to create a life to suffer in this world like me. ! ”

“I’m tired of it. There’s nothing to love in this world, and the world is not worth it. Why bother to create karma again?”

They are afraid that after the birth of a new life, they will also fall into themselves. The same pain, so they are afraid of having children and the reincarnation of fate.

As a senior patient with fear of marriage and fear of pregnancy, I have the right to answer this question.

1. Afraid of pain! Whether it's a caesarean section or a vaginal birth, either one sounds painful.

2. Afraid of ugliness! Stretch marks, pregnancy spots, chloasma, yellow face, a series of problems after giving birth are scary to think about.

3. Fear of old age! Imagine that a young girl suddenly becomes a mother... Then as a mother, you have to grab snacks for the baby...

4. I am still a baby myself, how can I give birth to a baby? Can't accept it, can't accept it.

5. Both mental age and ideological age are relatively immature. Nowadays, girls generally have a higher level of education and do not want to experience a qualitative leap in their identity stage too early.

6. The future is uncertain. I used to want to play more, but after I had Baoer, I had to watch him play, so I had to play for a few more years while I was young.

7. Without the constraints of the older generation’s ideas, after a series of iron rice bowls, pensions, pensions, insurance, nursing homes, etc., there is no need to worry about no one to support you when you get old.

7. I always feel that my mother is good at taking care of children.