Middle-aged woman, too tired, too difficult
Text/Xia Mo
01
Life is like a long road. Some people get smoother and wider as they go, but the road of a middle-aged woman , the more I walk, the heavier I get, and the more I walk, the more tired I become.
Writer Haruki Murakami said: "People do not grow old slowly, but they grow old in an instant."
When women reach middle age, they often feel like they have a lead ball tied to their feet. It feels difficult to move even an inch. Some middle-aged women feel old in an instant because of tiredness and fatigue.
A middle-aged woman, with an elder and a younger one, has no sense of security. She wants to make her family happy and make money to give herself the confidence to survive.
Children’s education cannot be separated from themselves, and the elderly also need to be taken care of when they are sick, which makes them suffer internally. Running back and forth, swallowing tears in my stomach, showing a smile to everyone, not letting anyone know my bitterness.
There are always trade-offs and gains and losses in life. However, middle-aged women have too many hardships. They have to take care of their families but cannot take care of their careers; they take care of their children, but they cannot be filial to their parents; they give their hearts to their parents. Love, but not understand...
I have to say that middle-aged women are too tired and not easy.
02. Middle-aged women often have to take into account family and career.
Middle-aged women have a sense of crisis one after another. I take care of my family, but I can't take care of my career.
Mrs. Kan in "An Jia" was no worse than her husband when she was young, and was even smarter and more capable than her husband. She helped her husband expand his territory and achieved legendary achievements.
When people reach middle age, they raise children, take the initiative to withdraw from the career stage, return to the family, and are willing to stay at home to support their husbands and children. As for Mr. Kan, he couldn't see his wife's efforts and even betrayed her by giving away a million-dollar mansion to a woman outside of marriage.
Mrs. Kan devoted all her efforts to the man, taking care of the elderly, caring for the children, and taking care of everything, while Mr. Kan was a womanizer and did not take Mrs. Kan seriously or in his eyes at all.
Mrs. Kan had dedicated her whole life to Mr. Kan. It was only when she got divorced that she realized that her life had been wrongly paid.
The difficulty for middle-aged women is that they cannot fulfill their careers if they choose a family and live a life of asking men for money. After a long time, it often makes men tired and disgusted: it only costs money and cannot help him share the pressure.
If you choose a career, you won't be able to take care of your family. A man will also complain that when he returns home, the pot is cold and there is no one to take care of his food, clothing, housing and transportation.
Faced with family and career, middle-aged women will only get more tired and tired in life if they choose neither of them.
Middle-aged women should not only know how to sacrifice and contribute, but also learn to love themselves.
Do something you like to do, realize your own value, let men participate in the family, and don't live as an accessory to the other party.
03. A middle-aged woman takes care of her children, but does not take care of her parents.
A middle-aged woman takes care of her children, but does not have the energy to be filial to her parents.
The children of middle-aged women still need their mother's care, but their parents beside them are old, sick, and bedridden, but they cannot be around to fulfill their filial piety and give them care and attention.
Qin Xianglian in "Bao Qingtian" encounters a disaster year and has her parents-in-law and children who need to be taken care of. She is reluctant to eat and drink, hoping that her parents-in-law and children can survive.
In order to get more food for their children, the parents-in-law refused to eat and starved to death. It's not that Qin Xianglian doesn't want the two old people to live, it's that she has more than enough intentions but not enough energy.
For the sake of children, parents have to be sacrificed to fulfill their children. At this time, only she knows the pain in the woman's heart, but she can only grit her teeth and seek a way out so that her children can have a good future.
Sometimes death is not scary. What is scary is that I still care about myself, and I can only live in this cold world with a sense of guilt, and live on to bring new hope to the children.
A middle-aged woman cannot express her difficulties, so she can only grit her teeth and move forward, keeping all her helplessness and tears in her heart.
No matter how weak your body is, you must persevere. There are always shortcomings in life.
Being ashamed of my parents will be a lifelong pain for me. But I have no choice but to let time slowly heal the wounds in my heart.
Women are strong as mothers, but they are still sensitive and fragile. No one can carry the burden for them, and no one can protect themselves from the wind and rain. Life is a practice, and you have to bear all the pain by yourself.
04. For middle-aged women, trivial things can make their marriages turbulent.
Middle-aged women’s suffering and tiredness, and trivial things can make their marriages turbulent and make women lose their sense of security.
When actor Liu Mintao talked about his marriage, he once said that the reason for his divorce was because of an ice cream.
The couple went to travel, and she wanted to eat an ice cream, but her husband refused her on the grounds that "who would eat this at such an old age?"
Only then did Liu Mintao realize that he didn’t even have the freedom to eat an ice cream without a man’s consent.
So I understand that a makeshift marriage will only waste my precious time. It is better to live independently and rely on myself to live the kind of life I want.
Marriage in middle age has lost its "resilience". It seems to be strong, but it is as fragile as ice.
When people reach middle age, their lives are often boring and boring, and they cannot find any happiness in numbness.
Marriage is as fragile as paper. In the eyes of outsiders, it may be glamorous and beautiful, but in the eyes of women, it is full of devastation and absurdity.
Women, instead of blindly trusting and relying on men, it is better to rely on themselves. Create a world and learn to live for yourself in the second half of your life.
Women, love your family and yourself, and don’t always live under the halo of men.
Women should have their own space, their own circle of friends, and their own time. They should constantly change roles and be themselves.
05
In the life of a middle-aged woman, a slight accident will throw the peaceful life out of balance and push her emotions to the brink of collapse. The emotion of collapse was like a spark, burning into every corner of my heart.
Middle-aged women, life is too tiring and difficult. Please learn to be kind to yourself.
Cai Lam said: "Study as much as you can, try your best, eat as much as you can, and life will be better. It's that simple."
Women, don't care too much about others. No matter how you look or think, don't demand that you do your best and become the most outstanding mother and lover.
Do what you like to do, get more benefits and space for yourself, and don’t overpay.
Life is really hard, you have to find something sweet for yourself, don’t give up your ability to make money, and don’t give everything you have to a man. Try to make yourself stronger and do your best.
If you have regrets, don’t let yourself be stagnant in the pain of the past. Look forward, let go of your obsessions, forget the pain, live in the present, and live lovingly for the future.
Life is hard, especially for middle-aged women. Create a more comfortable life for yourself and go on bravely.
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Today’s topic:
Do you think it is more difficult for men or women to reach middle age?
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