What is a godmother?
■Pray for smooth weather - worshiping the godmother
"Worship the godmother" is to recognize the adoptive father and adoptive mother. It is a popular childcare custom across the country. In the north, it is called "recognizing the godfather and godmother"; in the south, it is called "recognizing the foster father and foster mother", commonly known as "paying homage to the godfather and the godmother".
The godmother recognized in infancy may be permanent and maintain this relationship for life, or it may be temporary, ranging from three to five years at most, or a quick meeting and nothing to do with each other from then on. Some of the objects of "gangqin" are people and some are objects. The first purpose is to fear that the child will be delicate and difficult to give birth to, or that the child will die in infancy, and that he will be childless, so he can avoid disasters and save the child by praying to his godmother. Use "Blessings to the Goddess" to change the fortune, so as to achieve harmony between the upper and lower levels and a prosperous family. In order to make their children easier to raise, "gangqin" generally likes to adopt families with many children or poor families as adoptive fathers and mothers, because in families with many children, the children are like groups of small animals and are easy to grow up; in addition, , poor families generally have more children, and they are not delicate, but are easy to feed and grow up. Of course, there are also families that are willing to recognize each other's children as adopted sons or daughters in order to enhance their relationship. As for the wealthy dignitaries who take Kun Ling and the dancer as their goddaughter, that has ulterior motives and is no longer within the scope of our discussion.
The custom of "seeking relatives" has great differences in etiquette and customs due to different regions, ethnic groups and cultural backgrounds.
In Beijing, people generally believe that recognizing a godfather or godmother will be detrimental to the father and godmother’s biological children. Therefore, people who are not close relatives and friends generally do not dare to ask them to be the godfather of their children. For the godson and goddaughter, both parties must send gifts to each other and hold banquets. From now on, every year on three birthdays and two birthdays, the godson and goddaughter families must give gifts to the godfather and godmother, and the godfather and godmother must also give gifts to the godfather and godmother. Gifts are given in return, so even if you are not from a wealthy family, it is difficult to socialize.
Since you want to "go to God", you have to choose an auspicious day to hold the ceremony. At that time, parents should not only prepare a sumptuous banquet, but also prepare gifts for their children to honor their godfather and godmother. The most important gifts in this gift are the hat for the godfather and the shoes for the godmother. In addition, there are also items such as clothing. Of course, the godfather and godmother are not just in and out. The things that the godfather and godmother give to their godson and goddaughter must include a rice bowl, chopsticks and a longevity lock. In addition, they must also have a set of small clothes, shoes and socks, a hat, a bib and a bib. In the past, for these gifts, wealthy families would go to jewelry stores to order silver bowls and chopsticks, or go to the lamas of Huguo Temple and Baita Temple to buy wooden bowls to prevent children from breaking them if they accidentally dropped them. It is considered very unlucky to break a bowl by any chance.
In some places in Henan and Shaanxi, "gangqin" is completed by "touching". In areas such as Zhengzhou and Kaifeng, Henan, on the first morning after a baby is born, the baby's father has to go out to "touch" the baby. The first person he "touches", whether he is male or female, old or young, the father of the baby will kneel down and kowtow, then explain to him or her that a child has been born in the family, and ask the other person to name the child. In the past, most of the people who got up early in the countryside were old men who picked up dung. Some of them were not mentally prepared, but due to customs, they could not refuse, so they had to make nonsense. As a result, names such as "dung basket", "luotou", "dog baby" and "cat baby" came out. Although these names are a bit inelegant, fortunately they are just nicknames, which are people's pet names for children. They are only called when they were young, so it doesn't matter much. In some places, in addition to naming the baby, the person who is "touched" also gives the baby a gift and is recognized as a godmother. In some places in Shaanxi, "recognition of godmother" is usually carried out by the child's grandmother or grandfather on the day when the child is "full moon". The first adult he meets after going out is regarded as godmother or godfather. Of course, in addition to the randomness of this kind of "bumping", most occasions are often arranged in advance. The first person you "bump" to meet either has a good relationship with his family or someone with status and status. people.
In Hangzhou, there is a different custom for children to "see their godmother". The godmother they worship is not a living person, but the "impermanent ghost" often mentioned in Mr. Lu Xun's articles.
There, "parents were afraid that their son would not live long, and they were also afraid that it would be expensive to worship Godfather, so they did not send it to anyone but to the ghosts of impermanence." This is commonly known as "Worshiping Godfather Hu". According to local legend, the Impermanent Ghost is a ghost specially sent by King Yama to capture the souls of the deceased. The purpose of entrusting children to the Impermanent Ghost is to hope that it will not capture the souls of the children, so as to ensure longevity. In the past, people in the world did not know the name of the Impermanent Ghost, so they mistook it for the surname Hu, hence the title "Hu Qianye". The method of paying homage to Mr. Hu is as follows: the child’s parents first make a brand new white shirt, then bring it to the temple, exchange it for the old clothes on the idol of Mr. Hu, and exchange them with soju, sesame cakes, and incense candles. , silver ingots were offered and burned. Finally, the monks in the temple named Dezhi's son. From then on, every July, the child's parents would take the child to the temple to congratulate Mr. Hu on his birthday until the child reaches 16 years old.
In addition to the Han people, some ethnic minorities in my country also have the custom of "worshiping relatives", such as the Tujia people, who are very representative. In addition to sending their children to people with other surnames as "godsons" and "goddaughters", some families also send their children to trees, rocks, wells, pigs, dogs, chickens and other objects, and use them as gifts. Name the child after the object of worship. If it is a boy, it is usually called "Yanbao", "Shuibao", "Zhubao", "Chickenbao", etc.; if it is a girl, it is usually named "Yanmei", "Shuimei", "Goubao" "Sister", "Chicken Sister", etc. Because in the view of the Tujia people, only by sending children to others or things can the disaster stars be eliminated and the children grow up smoothly.
However, the ordinary "recognition of godfather" ceremony is completed as long as the child formally kowtows three times to godfather and godmother, and changes his name to godfather and godmother. If the child is young and particularly delicate, the godmother will wear a pair of particularly baggy red trousers, sit on the bed, and someone else will hold the child out of her crotch to show that the child is her biological child. Then the godmother puts a longevity lock on him or her and gives him or her a nickname, which he or she will use to eat with the bowls and chopsticks given by his or her father and godmother. This means that the children will become their children from now on, eat their food, and have nothing to do with their biological parents. From then on, the child can take advantage of the blessings of his godfather and godmother to grow up smoothly and live a long and healthy life.
Although the conservation custom of "worshiping relatives" has different manifestations in different regions and different ethnic groups, we can still find some similarities among them, that is: ( 1) The purpose is the same, both for children to be raised well and grow up smoothly; (2) The causes are similar, and both have a strong superstitious color; (3) The emotions are the same, and both are full of strong human feelings.
■Recognizing relatives
Recognizing relatives is a popular folk custom in Shanxi countryside in the old days. Most of the interactions after recognizing relatives are more frequent, and they all imitate the way of communication between relatives, forming a relatively fixed relationship.
Although there is no fixed procedure for recognizing a godmother in the countryside, it is generally recognized as a godfather, godmother, godbrother, godsister, etc. The reasons for the formation of the recognition of relatives are roughly as follows. The two families are friends and have a good relationship. In order to make this relationship relatively stable, the method of letting the next generation recognize their relatives is used to deepen the relationship. Such as recognizing adoptive father and adoptive mother. Some are because one party has shown great kindness to the other party's family, and one party wants to repay the other's kindness, so he or she adopts the method of recognizing relatives and becoming adopted children, forming a long-term relationship in a relatively fixed manner, in order to achieve the purpose of repaying the kindness. Purpose. Others, because the child is delicate and afraid of dying in the middle of the journey, adopt the method of recognizing the godfather, godbrother, and godsister to keep the child, so that the child can avoid misfortune and grow up. There are also some families who do this for the sake of becoming rich and noble, so that their children may consider rich people as their godfathers, or they may benefit from it in the future. In some cases, the child is sent to the wet nurse's home for breastfeeding since childhood, thus forming a new relationship between the child and the wet nurse. In the countryside, they are called wet nurse, wet nurse, or wet nurse. In fact, this is also a kind of godly relationship. There are various reasons for recognizing godly relatives, but the emergence of this kind of godly relationship makes the relationship between the two families naturally enter a sequence of kinship interactions.
The recognition of relatives can be found in all parts of Shanxi, and it is more common in Yanbei, Xinzhou, Jinzhong and southern Shanxi.
In rural customs, once you recognize your godfather, everything must be carried out according to the general procedures of rural interactions. All children who recognize their godfather and godmother must follow the country's etiquette and customs procedures during the New Year, festivals, birthdays and birthdays. Do it. As a godson, you have to take care of your godfather and godmother as they age, fulfill your duties as a godson, and provide certain financial support; while your godfather and godmother are responsible for your son’s marriage and childbirth. We must take care of major activities such as building and building houses and provide necessary support and funding.
With the development of society, the number of recognized relatives in rural Shanxi has become less and less, but it still exists in the countryside. This is a special kind of kinship that exists in society and has become a social network. one of the sides.
■La Gandie
"La Gandie" is a primitive way of making friends popular among people in many places in Baoshan area. From a folklore perspective, this kind of The formation of the custom is related to the backwardness of social production and people's "asking for help" mentality of longing for help other than family affection when encountering difficulties. Therefore, it is most common in mountainous villages with vast areas, sparse population, lack of medical care, and simple folk customs. See.
In mountain villages such as Wayao, Wama, and Wafang in Baoshan City, "godfathers" usually have two "pull" methods. One is to identify the target and negotiate a marriage. That is, when the baby in the mountains can run and run, the parents will express their wishes to the acquaintances in the neighboring villages that they like. If the other party agrees, they will choose an auspicious day, kill chickens and cook meat, invite relatives and friends, kowtow, Pick a name and complete the "Send Name" procedure. It is said that after a baby is "adopted" to his godfather, once he changes his surname, he is no longer his own son. Even if there are some small disasters in his "fate", it will be resolved.
What is interesting is another "pull" method - "resign yourself to fate and forcefully pull". This method of getting married can only be done between the second day of the Lunar New Year and the Lantern Festival. Families who want to "get a godfather" often choose a double day. The man will bring roosters, bacon and other food, and before dawn, he will go to the small bridge and narrow road outside the village and pull a thin white rope across the road where pedestrians must pass. line, and then ambush near it: no matter who passes by this place and breaks the white line, it is recognized as the in-laws, and the ambusher will rush out, bow his hands, and call "in-laws". It is difficult to disobey "God's will". Under normal circumstances, the person who comes has no choice but to comply, otherwise he will be stigmatized. So he buried a pot to make rice and had a picnic on the spot. After eating and drinking, go into the village to "recognize the door" and hold a worship ceremony. If the visitor is a woman, of course she is the "godmother"; if she is an unmarried man or woman, then she is the "godbrother", "godsister", "godbrother", "godsister"; if by chance she meets a cow. Domestic animals such as horses, sheep, dogs, etc. are also "pull" - their owners perform all the procedures and obligations on their behalf. However, the name must be based on the title of the tripwire animal, such as horse, dog, etc. .
Whether it is a deliberate choice or a "destiny" decision, once a godly relationship is formed, the two parties will become as close as a family and take care of each other. They will also visit at appropriate times during the New Year and holidays, treat each other with brotherly love, and get along well. The love affair even lasted for several generations and became a good story.
What is even more amazing is that in some mountain villages in Tengchong County, there is a custom of "pulling" a big tree as a "godfather", and many people have worshiped a certain ancient tree since they were children. They are called "godfathers" because their parents believe that the ancient trees are towering, with deep roots and luxuriant leaves, and a wide range of blessings. Once they become "godfathers", they can bless their children with no disease or disaster and a long life. Particularly devout people should ask the clergy to help calculate whether they are willing to harvest the big tree. If they are willing, they will choose an auspicious day in the zodiac to burn incense, and bow three times and kowtow on the ground to perform the ceremony. People are close to tree trunks.” Finally, you have to give your child a meaningful name. Because this custom has been around for a long time, there are many well-known ancient trees in Tengchong - such as the Leida tree in Xiaoxi, the big oak tree in Daju, the "Double fir" in Heshun, the goose feather tree in Mazhan, and the "King Ginkgo" in Jietou. " and so on, all of them are "under their knees" and have many "godsons" and "goddaughters" who are living or have passed away long ago, and many of them are named Shumao, Shurong, Shushou, Shusheng and Shusheng. Names like "Mei, Shuxiu, Shufang, Shuying" are "evergreen".