Please send funny text messages to girls!

. I have benefited a lot from knowing you. When you are with animals, I know the meaning of "birds of a feather flock together"; when you are with people, I know the origin of the word "volt".

2. During the Spring and Autumn Period and the Warring States Period, you were the commander-in-chief, with a pot lid on your head, a sack on your body, two plastic bags tied around your waist, two cans in your hands, and two cabbages on your feet. Shouting: "Who has broken wine bottles to sell!"

3. That day I said: "You are a pig." You said: "It's strange that I am a pig." So from now on I will call you "Pigs are weird"! Finally one day, you couldn't bear it anymore and shouted in front of everyone: "It's weird that I'm not a pig!"

4. Why are we destined in this life? In fact, we knew each other 1,000 years ago! It was in that autumn that you chased me for a long time, and you even used your tooth marks to leave me with eternal memories that will be passed down as legends. At that time, my name was Lu Dongbin.

5. Promise me that you will be calm no matter what you encounter, be determined no matter what you do, be optimistic and happy no matter where you are, and never tell anyone you meet. It's crazy!

6. You were so energetic that you stayed up for seven days and seven nights. You looked proud, arrogant and self-centered, so you went to an ideal health resort - a mental hospital.

7. People are like iron, food is like steel. If I don’t eat even one meal, I will feel hungry. When I see you, my heart will panic. No matter if it is iron or steel, I will vomit it quickly so I can escape! ! !

8. Tang Seng decided to put a tight spell on Bajie, Sha Seng and Bai Longma. When we were roping the white dragon horse, the horse cried: "Master, you can only harness four more hoops. I am a BMW, don't let people think of me as an Audi."

9. The seedless watermelon was successfully developed. Frequently participated in various celebrations and report meetings, which was a wonderful experience. The other watermelons were envious, but one watermelon was angry: "What's so beautiful about? There are no more generations to come."

10. The boss pointed at the beautiful yellow bird in the cage and said, "This bird is honest and doesn't fly around." The customer bought it back at a high price and opened the cage door: "Fly, we're home."

"Huang Niao laughed: "I was fooled, I'm...a little chicken! ”