Women say I'm a topic terminator. Chatting with me is irritating and my emotional intelligence is low. I don't even know what's wrong.

... of course it's your fault. You can't chat, all because you are too shy.

unlike introverts, introverts generally feel energetic when they are alone, while shy people want to communicate with others at any time, but they don't know how to restrain the anxiety caused by interpersonal communication.

Many boys are afraid of rejection when they flirt with girls for the first time, and hide themselves shyly for fear of leaving a bad impression on girls. This is a typical example.

In similar situations, we often become flustered and at a loss, which affects our expression and even leads to incoherence.

This question is so common that it is said that chatting is the best choice when chatting up people. So, what about talking about the weather? Without new topics, the chat can't go on, but it falls into an awkward atmosphere.

I've been waiting for a "right" time, and I don't know when it's right. In fact, I'm just not prepared psychologically. This "appropriate" time can be any time, and "waiting" is just an excuse.

I always think that I'm not good at this and that, and I'm worried about giving people a bad impression. I spend all my time obsessing about my own shortcomings, afraid of getting hurt, and I dare not take the first step.

For example, some chubby girls are reluctant to talk to others. Why? Because they care too much about their appearance and think that being fat is a kind of "defect", it is undoubtedly bring disgrace to oneself who takes the initiative to strike up a conversation.

Inferiority means paying too much attention to other people's opinions, ignoring one's own advantages and lacking the courage to take the initiative.

Because of our small circle, we seldom have the opportunity to meet new friends or meet people in different fields. Are you troubled by the lack of social skills?

I don't know how to deal with people because my social skills are not exercised, which is also one of the reasons why I can't chat.

don't give yourself negative psychological hints.

On strange occasions, we sometimes think, "Do I look embarrassed?" "No one talks to me, do they dislike me?" "I'm not good-looking, so let's not strike up a conversation" ...

Actually, we just become nervous in the crowd, not as embarrassed as we thought, and people around us don't dislike us. It's just that we think too much. On the contrary, if we realize this, it will be easier to chat with others on our own initiative.

focus on the things around you, not yourself.

You may feel that others are staring at you, which makes you feel uncomfortable. This distorted feeling is the main culprit of your anxiety.

At this time, we can be interested in people and things around us. Instead of obsessing about ourselves, we might as well appreciate some interesting things and dilute our insecurity.

keeping a straight face can make people feel uncomfortable. In fact, sometimes it's not that others don't want to get close to us, but it may be that we just seem to be in a bad mood and others don't take the initiative.

Even if you are nervous, keep smiling and look natural, and others will take the initiative to get along with us.

We can ask friends to introduce some of their friends or acquaintances, because it would be a good idea to try to meet new friends.

When we start to meet new friends, they are actually a little shy like us.

at this time, we don't have to worry about our own shortcomings, so we might as well find some topics to talk about and establish a talkative image.

Just like we are preparing a speech, we should constantly correct our words and deeds in front of the mirror. We can pretend that there is a person chatting with us standing opposite and practice again and again.

besides the weather, we can also talk about the latest news, sports events, hobbies and so on.