China Naming Network - Almanac query - Grateful for depression patients to improve their own cases.

Grateful for depression patients to improve their own cases.

Several of us went to a friend's house to exchange and study. My friend's mother is cutting watermelons and apples in the kitchen. She heard that I was talking to them about the cases of several depressed patients I had recently dealt with and contacted. My friend's mother is too excited to cut the fruit. She hurriedly ran out for consultation: "A good sister in our hometown upstairs, her daughter studied dance, piano and speech since she was a child. She spent so much effort on training, but one day she suddenly became so crazy ..."

I replied to my aunt that this situation can be investigated from two directions on the surface. One possibility is the disharmony between parents. Since childhood, children often fight in front of them, making them live in fear and insecurity, and it is even more impossible to have a sense of belonging at home. Secondly, there must be something wrong with parents' education methods. Before I could finish, my aunt scrambled to say, "My friend is very kind and friendly to us ..." I think menstruation still wants to scramble and cut off his train of thought, because it is meaningless to talk like this, and it also interferes with my train of thought and judgment. Then I stopped my aunt from continuing to grab words: "Please be quiet first, and listen to my analysis of the cases I contacted before answering your friend's questions. You don't study systematically, so your so-called good things may not hold water with me. If this person is really as good as you say, the child will be fine. "

After excluding menstruation's interference, I will continue to share with you this case that I recently contacted. This depressed patient is a 19-year-old girl who took the college entrance examination this year. In March, she suddenly showed abnormal behavior, anorexia and slight suicidal tendency. Going to the hospital for examination is moderate depression. When the little girl's mother was introduced by a friend to communicate, I told her: "Children are replicas, and parents are originals. Now there is something wrong with the copy. There must be something wrong with the original. If you always look for reasons in children, this problem will be difficult to solve. "

Since there is something wrong with the "original" of parents, it is natural to start with the "original" if you want to solve the problem of photocopies. I asked the mother, "What is your relationship with your lover?"

"I have a good relationship with my husband. We all go out arm in arm with our husbands ... "Mother replied excitedly.

I was very helpless to remind her: "Aunt, don't chat with me like this. You should answer everything I ask honestly, and never hide anything because of face, otherwise the matter will not be solved at all. It's a headache, but you say it's a sore foot. I hurt my foot. I prescribed medicine for my foot pain, but it didn't work in the end. Also said that the doctor's level is poor. Even if you take the wrong medicine, it will cause bigger problems. You have to weigh whether face is more important or daughter is more important. "

"Your feng shui is broken. As the saying goes,' the family has made progress'. If you are prosperous, how can this happen? Your daughter's depression shows that her family is not rich and is going downhill. I'm sure your family is not harmonious. If the family is harmonious, it will only be a sign of prosperity. "

The aunt was silent for a moment, and someone talked about her family experience: "My father-in-law has a mental problem. After the attack, he always beat people wildly and cut people with a knife. My husband was taken to Wuhan by his uncle when he was nine years old, and he started working at such a young age! Although my husband doesn't have much education, I think he is down-to-earth and enterprising, and I always feel that the couple can spell it out as long as they work hard. However, society is always so realistic, and our efforts have not brought us an imaginary life. My husband is depressed and always feels that this society is dark and hopeless. I didn't know my father-in-law was mentally ill until I got married, so I always felt cheated and complained that their family were liars. But there are already children, and it is impossible to divorce for children. "

"My husband usually likes boring and doesn't talk much. In the past two years, he went out to work two or three days a week, holding the TV at home every day, completely losing his previous pursuits and ambitions. My family is barely supported by' me' going to work. He is also a particularly proud person, and always hopes that his daughter can better help him earn back his lost face and unprecedented glory. Some time ago, my daughter was tired of studying and didn't want to do anything or go to school. My husband growled at his daughter, accusing her of not working hard and pursuing, and being a useless waste ... "

I am really worried about them when I hear this, and I feel sorry for the children living in such a family. When something goes wrong, parents still don't know how to reflect on themselves. They are still finding fault with their children and others. I thought to myself, "Is the college entrance examination important or the health and life of children important? Do you have to push your child to the wall and get a cold body? Do you have to die before you cry? Family education is really imminent. How dare you be a parent when you know nothing? It takes a lot of time to study and practice before going to work! If the work is not good, you can change it. If the child is not taught well, you can throw it away. I sincerely pray that traditional cultural family education can spread to more families and parents. "

"My daughter and husband are afraid that my mouth is broken. Because' I' always likes to complain in front of them. In fact,' I' has no other meaning, but I can't help nagging and complaining endlessly. Colleagues also think that' I' like to complain, so I introduce some books that shape myself or the art of speaking. I have read them, but after so many years, nothing has changed ... "

After I confirmed the message of disharmony in this family, I continued to explore: "What is the situation of this child's grandparents now? Is it alive or dead? Live with you? "

The child's mother said: "The child's grandfather often beats people crazy, and the child's grandmother can't live." In addition, my husband's own brother also inherited his father's illness, and he is also crazy from time to time. The child's grandmother had to divorce and take her' my' husband and his brother back to their parents' home. Grandpa lives alone in his hometown. In the winter when the child was one year old, the grandfather ran wildly outside and froze to death ... "

As the information became clearer and clearer, I then asked the most crucial question: "How many times has the child gone to worship since his grandfather died? When was the last time? This information is very important and must be answered clearly. "

"At ordinary times, we have the opportunity to go. The child is so old that he can visit her grandfather's grave twice at most. The last time was before the child went to the first day. " The child's mother tried to remember.

After listening to so much, I sighed in my heart and finally couldn't help sighing: "Alas! This child leads a hard life! This child is broken, and so is your home! Those who cut their roots suffer the most. "

"Each of us is a tree of life, and our parents, grandparents and commanding ancestors are all roots. When the roots are cut off, the trees naturally wither. From the child's point of view, she must have roots. She must hate your parents. This hatred is rooted, withered and depressed. From your parents' point of view, you are a tree, your parents and ancestors are the roots, and this child is the fruit of the flowers on your tree. Now this flower is dying, that is, you have broken the root! "

When prompted, the mother replied, "My grandmother and my husband's brother live in her parents' house. My husband loves them dearly and is afraid that I will blame them. Usually he only secretly gives money to his mother without telling me, but he doesn't dare to make more money for fear of being found out ... "

"That was one of the things when my child was in junior high school. At that time, a family of three was going to visit my husband's grandfather's grave. I mentioned it and went to my grandfather's grave. As a result, the daughter said,' the living and the dead are just one on the ground and one underground, so there is no need to worship.' I felt very cold when I heard it. "Mother added.

I reminded the mother of the child: "You are not qualified to blame the child. Children have such a mentality today, which is also taught by you as parents. You have to reflect on yourself ... "

After talking about the ins and outs of the little girl's depression, I answered the question that her friend, mother, good sister and daughter suddenly went crazy while hitting the iron.

"Aunt, from the perspective of the" Four Disciplines ",your neighbor's daughter suddenly went crazy, indicating that there is no blessing. This is called disaster from the mouth. What do you mean there is no happiness? It's evil. Fundamentally speaking, it must be rooted, and it must be a great loss in filial piety ... "

When I said the word "wicked", my friend's mother clapped her thighs excitedly. "Yao teacher, you're right. My neighbors and sisters, their parents have the special right to be rich. After they got married, the man's relatives always turned to them for help. Later, neighbors and sisters forced her husband and his brothers and sisters, including parents, to sever ties with all relatives and friends and never contact them again. In the Spring Festival the year before last, their family bought a whole sheep, and her husband secretly took some back to his parents. The neighbor's sister found out and ran back to get all the meat back. She also scolded the table and bench for leaving ... "

"Their family is very rich. In order to cultivate this daughter, they also paid special attention and spent a lot of energy and cost. Unfortunately, I suddenly went crazy. In recent years, all over the country, as long as they heard that this disease can be cured, they all went out to inquire and spent a lot of money. We were in Xiamen two years ago, and I heard that some experts could watch it. They all came to Xiamen specially. Can' I' let my neighbors and sisters find Mr. Yao? "

I thought to myself, most of them think that finding a master to say a spell can cure people. How can I have time to fool around with them? Besides, now is the key time for me to bury myself in my studies and accumulate energy, and I don't want to be distracted. One more thing, I really want to take over. After treating parents' in-laws, how can they change so easily? This is definitely not something that can be solved in a short time. In order not to delay the accumulation of energy and serve the public better in the future, I can only refuse. Only if I have more energy will I have the opportunity to help more people with attitude in the future.

I introduced Qin Dongkui's 33 episodes of "Geomantic Principles of Harmonious Family" to my friend's mother: "Even if they travel all over Qian Shan, they can't find the real person, the real method and the solution. You can look at this CD-ROM first. After reading this CD-ROM, you will know why your neighbor has problems. You can have a good idea after reading it, and then recommend it to your neighbors and sisters. If they are willing to look, realize their own problems and are willing to change, they may come to me in the future. Otherwise don't waste each other's time. I have no time to dawdle. I will shoot if I have an attitude, but I have no attitude to find someone else. "

Then I briefly shared another case, a 25-year-old boy with mental illness, which was more serious than their depression. I just learned a little what I taught the parents of this psychopath. I arranged for two couples to study the videos and books I arranged, and at the same time, I gave lectures to two couples by phone once a week. Help them digest and understand, and correct their wrong words and deeds and cognition in time. At the same time, I also check an assignment every week, that is, the couple must tell two things about the efforts, advantages or progress made by the other party for the family last week.

Wife: "Through systematic study, my husband's changes are becoming more and more obvious. Last week, I went to work in the field, and my hand was cut deeply by a sickle, and I put a band-aid. When he came back from work that day, he happened to watch me take a basin of clothes to the river to wash, so he took it and washed it himself. This is the first time that we have helped me wash clothes for twenty or thirty years since we got married! "

"After a period of research, we know a little. That day, he preached to his divorced daughter next door. They didn't learn and didn't understand your thoughts. He's kind, but it's only annoying. When he said it himself,' I' wouldn't let him say it. As a result, he lost his mind for a moment and left by himself. If he hadn't studied for so long, he would have yelled on the spot and even beat me up ... "

Husband: "In the past, she always liked to find fault with me and always liked to say that I was not. Now, after a period of study, her changes are so real that she is no longer critical of me as before. I have a bad temper, she said I like to play, and it's my fault ... "

"She has become much gentler now, and the way she communicates with her children has also changed fundamentally. It turns out that she is particularly impatient, always self-righteous, and never listens to others or children. Now she is more and more patient, and she is constantly changing her attitude and way of treating her two children. She is really attentive. "

Whenever they are excited to share each other's progress and advantages, I will say, "Today's changes are all helped by the' Four Discs' and CD-ROM teachers. Let's give these benefactors a little applause to express our gratitude! " They all laughed, and ten thousand people were willing to applaud. Although I am on the phone, I can hear steady and excited applause. I thank them very much for each telephone class: "Where did I give you a lesson?"? It is obvious that you are collecting my money! " ! Every time I listen to your phone call, I can be full of laughter. If I want to laugh for ten years as people say, I have to live a long life! "

At the end of each class, I will also ask, "You are blessed to meet traditional culture and education, which is the virtue of your ancestors." After the phone call, go and kowtow to the grave of your grandparents' great-great grandparents. I am grateful for the blessings of my ancestors. "

Listen, I'm sharing something about the couple who are learning to change the road. Everyone present inadvertently showed a relaxed smile. What shocked me most was that this boy with mental problems had changed with the efforts of his parents Qi Xin for half a year. I've been sick for several years, but I can't speak normally. I just purr, uh-huh, uh-huh I heard a normal speech on the phone that day. Although I am a tour guide, I am still surprised at the change of this child. Because this is also the first time I have taken over such a complicated and serious case! Of course, it will take time to completely cure the child.

Along the way, because of the change, everyone is happy to call me teacher. In fact, I am particularly grateful. It is everyone's trust that gives me the opportunity to constantly apply the theory to real life. It is their trust that gives me a deeper understanding and understanding of the theory. They are all my nobles and benefactors. Always be grateful!

(No wonder the Analects of Confucius said, "Be cautious and pursue the future, and the people are virtuous." Since ancient times, China people have attached importance to filial piety education and cultivated their children's respect and gratitude to their parents and ancestors. For example, if you pay homage to the Yellow Emperor and are full of respect and gratitude to the Chinese ancestors you never met thousands of years ago, won't you know how to respect and appreciate your living parents more? Now, under the impact of western culture, the best and most moral things in China's traditional culture are missing, and many things only lose their connotations in form. Take ancestor worship as an example. Many people went to the ancestral graves to kowtow and left. It's just that everyone does it, and it has no meaning at all. More often, parents and grandparents should tell their children about the kindness of their ancestors and their contributions to the family line. If our ancestors fooling around without virtue, he will not come to a good end, and our descendants will not be able to pass it on. Usually, when we miss the kindness of our ancestors and worship them, we really approach them with heartfelt gratitude and nostalgia, talk to them, report to our children and grandchildren to inherit their family business well, and strive to make the family business handed down by our ancestors more prosperous. )