Weekend lovers: How to keep marriage fresh forever?
"If the husband and wife are not perfect about each other's marriage and have different degrees of disappointment and boredom with each other or the marriage itself, the marriage counselor can advise them to separate for a while. During the separation, the two sides can date according to their physical and mental needs, but try not to support them to restore their life together before rebuilding their confidence in marriage and regaining their love for each other. " This passage was written when I was listening to a marriage counseling class in 2002.
Interestingly, from the past 20 1 1 to the present, several couples I interviewed have given me opposite examples. They chose "separation" when they thought it was best for each other. They returned to their parents' home or "their own room" in their pre-marital life with beautiful love and acacia, and started again without asking each other. All independent single life, with his wife or husband back to the state of communication when in love, only "occasionally try" to live together on weekends and holidays. They are all wearing wedding rings. Everything is the same as married people except that they don't have to get along with each other every day. They buy houses together, repay loans together, discuss career development together, and face all the changes and responsibilities in their lives together ... They call themselves "far-away people".
Compared with the opening Bible of marriage counseling, the "separation" advocated and practiced by them is endowed with completely different meanings and functions. The intimate relationship between living separately and occasionally keeps each other fresh and avoids being lazy and picky about the other half because of living together for a long time. Their marriage seems that everyone has a circle, but they just take out a semicircle to overlap with each other, and the other semicircle will always belong to him, and the other party can only peep but not infringe. People who leave their marriage say that they should always keep their marriage in a state of elation, always face their lover with the best side and leave the back of the moon for themselves to see.
There are many different views on this kind of "walking marriage" that appears quietly. Some people say that this is a kind of deception in disguise. Marriage requires two people to "really meet", so the marriage that only pays half a circle is deliberately beautifying themselves and lacking sincerity; Some people say that divorce reflects young people's fear and rejection of responsibilities in marriage. They just want to experience the pleasure of marriage and are unwilling to face the obligations that two people should share in marriage. Some people say that divorce is a helpless move. Nowadays, young people are under great pressure in life and spirit, and they can't bear a series of troubles brought by marriage. ...
No matter what others say, the following divorced couple are still enjoying the happiness and comfort brought by this form of marriage rationally and happily. Marriage is the result of individual's complete personal choice of emotional life. Different people will interpret different marriage stories for different reasons, and respecting them is also a manifestation of social tolerance.